tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16859706900657235222024-03-14T00:45:20.992-07:00Single muslim mum and kids/mum and kidsUmm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-28368170623556434592023-04-11T05:01:00.002-07:002023-04-11T11:03:35.734-07:00Ramadan in South MoroccoWe normally do not travel anywhere during Ramadan unless it’s going to my home country. This Ramadan coincided with the school holidays, so we decided to have an impromptu holiday in a Muslim country. I searched the neighbouring Muslim country list and found cheap tickets to Ouarzarzate, Morocco. Having been to Morocco before, I was not much impressed and found it very chaotic, most places I visited during my previous visit were big cities: Marrakesh, Casablanca, Rabat, Meknes and Agadir. I did make small trips to some villages, but they were mainly tourist places. When booking for Ouarzarzate, I did not expect it to be any different from my previous visit to Morocco, however, the South of Morocco did take me by surprise.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSaiUz0JG6hmwMTOV4BvLDnk0AIdKDvQKLBu9xC4SCfzm6f9kqCeZLIM_GNGtWZxSPQqQmiZpa9cnZRlsKd54Tn4sftrHSlUovKZ5-QoZr-Pz4qQsivEFvhK1nCjdY-VJCaWM_bHpgrnrvsrFF3s-m9udjM6qHG-rMWvqTR9Qyju1MDOnDBE6AyfhS/s1600/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-42.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSaiUz0JG6hmwMTOV4BvLDnk0AIdKDvQKLBu9xC4SCfzm6f9kqCeZLIM_GNGtWZxSPQqQmiZpa9cnZRlsKd54Tn4sftrHSlUovKZ5-QoZr-Pz4qQsivEFvhK1nCjdY-VJCaWM_bHpgrnrvsrFF3s-m9udjM6qHG-rMWvqTR9Qyju1MDOnDBE6AyfhS/s320/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-42.jpg"/></a></div>
Ouarzarzate is a relatively developing city, with a recent tiny airport, where planes look like taxis with wings. It is very close to the city of Ouarzarzate which is relatively quiet compared to many cities in the northern part. It does have the normal features of Souk, and even has a church and a synagogue. It is a beautiful city to shop in especially since none of the sellers tries to harass you into buying stuff unlike Marrakesh, you can enjoy browsing better, but as it is in any part of Morocco you still have to haggle over the price. However, although some sellers did tell us exorbitant prices, others were more truthful, so it’s best to ask around for prices before you get a good estimate of the real price.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtuBDrfS7t_BIWt4p6boIzC47Lh_YXiaLgslQ_SfiaFJSAz-WYjQQFyPieoxdDriuCitH9r87jwwfQ2W0g6UAND7bML2l9gp1BcFt1ntM_m7xRmkAoXwaFmskRyttlgKKeFAzsN2oBGxihOBnnuXxgDSUteO4DY2eD7b0vKlYGtxsRcORIxLsckAv-/s2048/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-27-51%202.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtuBDrfS7t_BIWt4p6boIzC47Lh_YXiaLgslQ_SfiaFJSAz-WYjQQFyPieoxdDriuCitH9r87jwwfQ2W0g6UAND7bML2l9gp1BcFt1ntM_m7xRmkAoXwaFmskRyttlgKKeFAzsN2oBGxihOBnnuXxgDSUteO4DY2eD7b0vKlYGtxsRcORIxLsckAv-/s320/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-27-51%202.jpg"/></a></div>
Ouarzarzate is known as the city of film making, Ait Ben Haddou, the little town used in many films to represent small Arabic towns feature in many films and it is completely free to visit. Beware though at one of the gates, two men would not allow us to get through as they were charging ‘renovation’ costs, they even had a sign on the wall and fake receipts. However, we stood our ground, refused to pay, and were told we could get in free from the other two entrances. If ever they ask to charge you, tell them you have done your research and know it is free to enter.
There is also the Atlas studio and CLA studio there where you can visit film sets of other big banner films. We could not visit CLA as it was being set up for the filming of Gladiator 2 and were told filming will start in June. There are other free places while you are driving around Ouarzarzate that were used for film scenes, such as the gas station in ‘The Hills have eyes’. You will find that Ouarzarzate is still less busy than Marakkesh even though it has many attractions. There is a lake just outside the city which is somewhat an oasis from the dry landscape. The nearest biggest city to Ouarzarzate is 4 and a half hours drive through the Atlas mountain range, with very few villages on the way and a couple of gas stations, so make sure the car is filled up before the journey. There are several police checkpoints around Ouarzarzate and you are expected to slow down and stop if asked to. If there is a stop sign, you must stop completely before turning even if it is clear. We probably got stopped about 6 times over an 8-day period, sometimes more than once a day, but once they realised, we were tourists, they didn’t ask us for anything, plus we do have the advantage of speaking French. If you are renting a car, finding an automatic car can be a bit tricky, but if you can drive a manual car then it is very easy. We were charged 3600 dhs for 8 days for a manual 7-seater including insurance (this roughly works out about £300) that we pre-booked through a local rental agency. There were 10 of us, so we had a second car which was an automatic car and was charged more for that one. The main roads are paved, however, the Southern part is still developing and roads are still being built, you may find many side roads unpaved, however, we did drive on those with a small Kia Picanto with no issue.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuRbul1MNMUFdUPIGcfcVUQtW6icfz6L9oJ-C1D1dYZg2O5aSlkIXMGgrPrHWAtI66dtf-ReEgT8bBupO1mxWpANZEAO6VDogzJAXYUdeiDPbrwMAQbxJxXK3G57oYd0zifHUxMOApU1yEuVvOEHqB7m0VzT0KhtfeWimPi3bp_wJfkx_7mTrgeL25/s1600/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-48.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuRbul1MNMUFdUPIGcfcVUQtW6icfz6L9oJ-C1D1dYZg2O5aSlkIXMGgrPrHWAtI66dtf-ReEgT8bBupO1mxWpANZEAO6VDogzJAXYUdeiDPbrwMAQbxJxXK3G57oYd0zifHUxMOApU1yEuVvOEHqB7m0VzT0KhtfeWimPi3bp_wJfkx_7mTrgeL25/s320/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-48.jpg"/></a></div>
We stayed in a 200-year-old Kasbah run by a lovely couple and their dedicated team near the town of Skoura. I cannot recommend Kasbah 123 Soleil (this is not a paid advertisement) enough as they did go above and beyond for us. The Kasbah is a retreat in a small village surrounded by date trees, olive trees, pomegranate trees, orange trees and any other fruit and vegetables. It even has a little farm on the premises, and we were graced with fresh eggs every day for our meals. Saadia, who runs the Kasbah showed us around and how she maintains the plantation during the dry season. She also welcomed us in her kitchen and showed us how to make authentic Berber food such as couscous and tagine amongst many other dishes. As it was Ramadan, we were fasting and she served us the yummiest Harira soup every day to break our fast. We were self-catered some days and even on the days we were not, she still managed to get us some of her homecooked food. We were told we could use the vegetables available in her garden for our cooking and the workers helped us to harvest some vegetables. The Kasbah also has an outdoor swimming pool with no chlorine, which the kids loved and a Hamam for which we were charged a minimal fee. Monday was Souk Day, and Saadia personally took us to the souk to buy what we need and even helped us with the bargaining. She also accompanied us for shopping in the shops around Skoura and told us to let her do the bargaining. We loved the honesty of the people in Skoura, we had been to the shops before on our first day and asked for prices, Saadia was told the same prices as us, but she still managed to get the price down a little. There is no big supermarket in Skoura, you have to go to Carrefour in Ouarzarzate, which is about 50 minutes’ drive. However, prices in the small shops in Skoura were very similar to what we found in Carrefour. Saadia also made arrangements for the kids to have Camel rides, and it was way cheaper than I remember paying last time I was in Morocco. She also offered the free services of her workers to guide us around places of interests, which we politely declined, as we knew how busy they were at the Kasbah. But she did recommend us places to visit including a nearby oasis.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLJW8ru1gHTPXjoJn-RsUHvhS3HYA1j1QuyYNEZxWbGKaCo5H1WfD0uo8B5nR7m92dS2ZWCD96musWa3M6gJdaj7XXn9pM1FNGiF4mwmx_NwuCtKPkOdhsCjXzIHoGS3x1OJx77b8DN_DEXG1sYhM2W70vN3iY2oKxE6SYzWAh6C1AJ59QTdh4R0ak/s4032/IMG_4040.jpeg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLJW8ru1gHTPXjoJn-RsUHvhS3HYA1j1QuyYNEZxWbGKaCo5H1WfD0uo8B5nR7m92dS2ZWCD96musWa3M6gJdaj7XXn9pM1FNGiF4mwmx_NwuCtKPkOdhsCjXzIHoGS3x1OJx77b8DN_DEXG1sYhM2W70vN3iY2oKxE6SYzWAh6C1AJ59QTdh4R0ak/s320/IMG_4040.jpeg"/></a></div>
The kids absolutely loved this holiday with nature, and took it upon themselves to sleep on the rooftops under the stars. We felt really safe there, away from the hustle and bustle of the city life. We witnessed first-hand how Ramadan is experienced by the locals, everything closes down when it is Iftar time (breaking the fast), even food places and Carrefour, the biggest supermarket, however after Taraweeh ( the night prayers) the whole city comes to life in Ouarzarzate and it is something to relish.
We were surprised at how kind and honest people were in the South. In Ouarzarzate, we were offered to try snails for free by a happy chap who was selling them, he told us to try everything whilst we are there. The first day no one tried the snails, the next day most of the kids did try them and enjoyed them! Unfortunately, I am not that adventurous when it comes to meat. The Berber and the people from the South were some of the most welcoming people we came across.
We hope we will go back, not just as tourists but as family members of the people we have met and become friends with now.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixXZIyJzfV9QpRa3YQRphl7PTp4xKMufSdNoVr5-nNknWi43kqJskNJxDMf5105ODbdZfPulQzHUEUpuok3yJVlD9CXxZRXFbuRf69asRej6B5uq8mGKW4lEYsn3NNPLxF-UYX36fzDL-aSwoZgIXoEZ9fSG9EUcNzuFYdeHd-yDTqbrdYysC0Or5z/s1600/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-49%202.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixXZIyJzfV9QpRa3YQRphl7PTp4xKMufSdNoVr5-nNknWi43kqJskNJxDMf5105ODbdZfPulQzHUEUpuok3yJVlD9CXxZRXFbuRf69asRej6B5uq8mGKW4lEYsn3NNPLxF-UYX36fzDL-aSwoZgIXoEZ9fSG9EUcNzuFYdeHd-yDTqbrdYysC0Or5z/s320/PHOTO-2023-04-09-16-24-49%202.jpg"/></a></div>Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-22353082443048026722022-09-02T16:01:00.004-07:002022-09-04T05:34:18.743-07:00All About Cyprus<p> <b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; text-align: justify;">All you need to know before travelling to Cyprus</b></p><p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMn_Hht3xficGvr0JTfCNd9-NuP4you-xMgnHyFf2BMVjqte5EvfilGz3N3IMWtHEaGsvzF0JmzaJ56ePco37VFs2-1EXzbrvdJPsJG_Dnn0hSkCpx3qWORaR5reZe_-XfZ6upXtTh1adm_vhT3qGH-R6zF6mgKb9LandjG8dD5I1tLHIpYPFfuejF/s4032/IMG_2047.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMn_Hht3xficGvr0JTfCNd9-NuP4you-xMgnHyFf2BMVjqte5EvfilGz3N3IMWtHEaGsvzF0JmzaJ56ePco37VFs2-1EXzbrvdJPsJG_Dnn0hSkCpx3qWORaR5reZe_-XfZ6upXtTh1adm_vhT3qGH-R6zF6mgKb9LandjG8dD5I1tLHIpYPFfuejF/s320/IMG_2047.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Blue Lagoon (Paphos)</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; text-align: justify;"><br /></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Disclaimer: I have not travel blogged in a while due to COVID. Our last travel was in December 2019 in Italy. Cyprus was one of the few places that were still open to non-vaccinated visitors during COVID-19 travel bans.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">I do not receive any payment for any of the places mentioned. I just share my experience to help other travellers.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b> </b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b>Airport<o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Cyprus is divided into two countries, Northern Cyprus/ Turkish Republic of Cyprus and (South) Cyprus which is part of the EU. There are three airports in Cyprus, Ercan in Northern Cyprus and Larnaca and Paphos in EU-Cyprus. Deciding which airport to land in is crucial as it will restrict your movement around the island. The Greek/EU Cyprus Government do not recognise Northern Cyprus and as such if you land in Ercan (located in Northern Cyprus), you will struggle to cross the border to visit the EU/Greek side. The best thing to do is to land in Paphos or Larnaca if you want to travel around the whole island and visit the other side.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b>Car Rental<o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">We rented a pre-booked car from a well-reputed international car rental company at Larnaca Airport where we landed. If you haven’t pre-booked, not to worry as there are plenty of car rentals to choose from. I would also advise you to buy a comprehensive insurance cover if you intend to travel the whole island. Please note, if you choose to take the car to Northern Cyprus, the car will not be covered by the insurance bought in South Cyprus and you will need to buy additional insurance at the checkpoint before crossing over at the cost of £20 for 3 days, this will enable you to cross back and forth for 3 continuous days. The car rental company cannot stop you from crossing over, but they will advise you against it, this is the normal procedure. I would highly recommend renting a 4-wheel drive if you are of the adventurous kind and want to visit some of the remote areas of the island, if not you can always rent quadbikes or book jeep safaris, there are certain areas north of Paphos which cannot be visited by a normal car past a certain point, namely the road leading to Lara Beach and past Lara Beach (Turtle beach) going up the mountains. In perfect honesty, we saw cars trying to get to Lara Beach, and it was a battle for them, and we could see some metal flapping at the bottom of the car. This is very important as your car rental policy will stipulate there is no cover for damage caused on off-road driving. We had planned on renting a normal 7-seater car due to cost, and there being 6 of us. When we got to the airport, we were lucky enough to be offered an upgrade to a 4x4 7-seater for a minimal fee (I had already checked online this would have cost us a fortune if we pre-booked). Even with the minimum fee, the car rental was costing us less than it would have cost us to do jeep safaris or rent a quad bike. If you can afford it, rent a 4x4, there are some exceptional places you will be able to drive to.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Note that they drive on the same side as the UK in both Northern and South Cyprus. The motorways tend to be not so busy, there can be some traffic in the cities such as Limassol, Larnaca and Paphos. There were no visible fixed cameras in South Cyprus and drivers definitely were driving above the speed limit they also run through Red lights and will beep you to do so too. I had trouble using Apple Maps there, but Waze (run by Google maps) worked just fine most of the time. A charge will be applied by your network provider due to Brexit if you are a UK citizen whilst using GoRoam Europe in South Cyprus, and GoRoam World in Northern Cyprus. Northern Cyprus has cameras everywhere, and there is also more police patrol, and we have seen them fining people. City names on maps are also different to the actual signs, for example, Lefkosa is Nicosia on Google maps, Lemosos in Limassol. The places have two names generally, one in Greek, and possibly the other more international.<o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkl2A-ETVhP4SE3LTLQZreY8jcfMbiMvmXF1iAslZ3gGC52q4271l17HvMgdwm2tHUf2KCdRSycag9e3V6ihMSULlqj1oKfxNUm1LpKC9122qcplnYIobWqQBGKKfaO-sykaE3G68DAvC3cS0l97BwPSMTHKUDlkl-FRE_Tk6CnWYFz065XSPEju0r/s4032/IMG_2469.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkl2A-ETVhP4SE3LTLQZreY8jcfMbiMvmXF1iAslZ3gGC52q4271l17HvMgdwm2tHUf2KCdRSycag9e3V6ihMSULlqj1oKfxNUm1LpKC9122qcplnYIobWqQBGKKfaO-sykaE3G68DAvC3cS0l97BwPSMTHKUDlkl-FRE_Tk6CnWYFz065XSPEju0r/s320/IMG_2469.HEIC" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">View from Apostolos Andrea Monastery</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b>What to see and do<o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">South Cyprus is a tourist destination seeking beaches and driving all around the South, you have a sense of them advertising nothing else but beaches and churches. There are very few tourist signposts around the island that are not related to beaches or churches, the tourist signposts are normally brown. Agio stands for ‘church’ and you will definitely see a lot of Agios. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">We love churches, but there are so many, and you can only select a few, some of the famous ones are the Missing Persons Monastery (Women are not allowed to visit the monastery, and men have to be fully clothed as shorts are not allowed), apparently, there is a Holy Cross there. There is also the famous Monastery of Cats, if you have a phobia of cats like I do, definitely a place to avoid. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There is also the Hala Teke Mosque in Larnaca, this is a very old mosque which includes some tombs that can be visited free of charge, again you have to be fully clothed to visit the place. There are also cats around, but they are normally fed so don’t tend to bother you and mainly sleep during the day or mind their own business.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Cyprus has all kinds of beaches to offer, and choosing the beach depends on the activity you intend to do. Paphos has some great kiteboarding beaches if this is your thing. Most parts of the island are suitable for swimming, but I would advise swimming in areas where there are lifeguards. Personally, the area around Nissia beach, Fig Tree beach was the best; sandy beaches calm water, and fish swimming around you, great if you have little ones! There are two Blue Lagoons in Cyprus, one past Lara Beach and the second in Kavo Greko (sea caves), generally speaking, you will need a boat to swim in both, as the area is very rocky, I would strongly recommend not diving in from the cliffs as it is very rocky, and you may end up with an injury. Most beaches with lifeguards have some sort of shower area and changing cubicle. <o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1Qb7weP1WNkRg2IbRgEo059cSB544fr81AiBYKI2ZOMS_tLaKhARPBxq4KmgfosjFU6w8K-vRc2GlULcWKZiiATn3UErX2qMRv6zTvgmM3EN5CR0SISLiGRObaDTiLWHDkLam_klCfVXpmk2a5Vx8WkNEs31-hi3RHvyeIiaXi8u-Eudyg_mOIRYF/s4032/IMG_2571.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1Qb7weP1WNkRg2IbRgEo059cSB544fr81AiBYKI2ZOMS_tLaKhARPBxq4KmgfosjFU6w8K-vRc2GlULcWKZiiATn3UErX2qMRv6zTvgmM3EN5CR0SISLiGRObaDTiLWHDkLam_klCfVXpmk2a5Vx8WkNEs31-hi3RHvyeIiaXi8u-Eudyg_mOIRYF/s320/IMG_2571.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nissia beach</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There are plenty of ruins around Cyprus to choose from, the ones in Paphos are the most known. We visited in August when it was hitting around 36 degrees, and as such avoided being in the sun and did not visit a lot of ruins as there is no shade. Also, we have been to Rome and other places and have seen plenty of ruins, so it was not really something we were interested in.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Other than churches and beaches, the mountains will add a cooling effect to your holiday, it is a nice escape from the heat, also beware you are still looking at temperatures above the 30s in most places. Troodos is a great choice for walking around and was probably the coolest place at 21 degrees. On the way to Troodos, depending on where you are coming off, I would advise visiting a waterfall; we visited Chantara waterfalls, which included 3 waterfalls and a water pool. It was refreshing to walk in the water, which was not too cold, nor too hot.<o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifbWG4_0hHv1Qre4dELY1liLEGTJjOMwSFe0q_v4bE4axPou6iEEXf4H04bFqdpsXHcryhBjvjT6x0AQL4hhm-MT-OgCpybqv7P83ToTQgAf-5yKBvVZWUkHyNH3yoBEjFVocreYCA3zECXWw4m4ZaAdu4vFksOpjQsf472i2NRDzApCNnlr8VmJgX/s4032/IMG_2117.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifbWG4_0hHv1Qre4dELY1liLEGTJjOMwSFe0q_v4bE4axPou6iEEXf4H04bFqdpsXHcryhBjvjT6x0AQL4hhm-MT-OgCpybqv7P83ToTQgAf-5yKBvVZWUkHyNH3yoBEjFVocreYCA3zECXWw4m4ZaAdu4vFksOpjQsf472i2NRDzApCNnlr8VmJgX/s320/IMG_2117.HEIC" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Water pool at Chanter waterfalls</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">The small villages like Kalavasos are nice to visit to get a feel of the locals. They lose the roads off at night, so all the restaurants have their tables out and the whole village comes to life as a community. Lefkara is another village to visit, it is known for its silver jewellery and lace market. On your way to Lefkara, you will see signposts of the Bio Olive Farm, it is free to visit, but be warned, you will want to buy everything they make. The farm is owned by a husband and wife who will make you try everything in the shop, and it tastes absolutely beautiful. The couple is passionate about Olive Oil. The wife made us try so many things, and everything tasted so good! We probably cost them more in tasting than what we actually spent buying there due to airport hand luggage restrictions. She makes everything out of fresh olive oil, we bought some sweet olive oil (watermelon flavoured). We were offered a whole platter upon arrival just for tasting, and even when we left she packed us some free olives to eat for the rest of the holiday. Surprisingly, the kids loved that place, I thought they probably would have little interest in an Olive Farm but apparently, they were fascinated by all that goes on there.<o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYBqRLxMBosn1IIiK7hUgAifSJC5aZmHj4iCsfLmS5z4ZpZ486wCzHV5xAtRbVtaem2eGXU1nNsS4FPnJtNhuQ6Ix_rZ4NlxQre5jOtH5mJFhiO0P_o_8YzI-J1X6aToHKgNo0ejInm1XmcZrC7b-qPFAs8Y_-8SPuKL7ZQRRMogzX3iI9zqWS8AEF/s4032/IMG_2208.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYBqRLxMBosn1IIiK7hUgAifSJC5aZmHj4iCsfLmS5z4ZpZ486wCzHV5xAtRbVtaem2eGXU1nNsS4FPnJtNhuQ6Ix_rZ4NlxQre5jOtH5mJFhiO0P_o_8YzI-J1X6aToHKgNo0ejInm1XmcZrC7b-qPFAs8Y_-8SPuKL7ZQRRMogzX3iI9zqWS8AEF/s320/IMG_2208.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tasting at Bio Olive Farm</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There are several Salt Lakes where Flamingos may be visible. We saw some from far away in the Salt Lake near Limassol but there were none in the Salt Lakes near Larnaca.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There is also a Camel Park and a Donkey Park. Camel Park includes the use of the swimming pool, but we did not visit Camel Park. We also did not visit Donkey Park, but you can get Donkey milk ice cream there, which has a different taste from the usual ice cream. However, if you want to see wild Donkeys for free, then head to Karpass Peninsula in Northern Cyprus. You will see plenty on your way up to Apostolos Andrea Monastery, a beautiful, restored Monastery by the beach. The Donkeys roam free and will walk around your car, it is always handy to have a few carrots that you can wave by the side of the window to get them to move to the side. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Coming back to ice cream, we accidentally found a small family-run Ice Cream parlour in Nicosia, Northern Cyprus. By far this is the best ice cream we have had, there were so many flavours to choose from, Walnuts and Figs, Tahini, Bitter Orange, Rose and many others. The owner keeps experimenting with the flavours, we went two days in a row, and each day we got different unique flavours to try. This is definitely a cheap and great place to have homemade ice cream. Paying a visit to Sedo Ice-Cream is a must if you are in Nicosia, the décor will also blow you away. The family has been in the ice cream-making business for generations, and they certainly know what they are doing. I would also recommend you try the local delicacy, some sort of sweet bread with cheese, it tasted like heaven. We were lucky to be given a tour around the ice cream-making area which is attached to the shop and the owner’s house. They also entertained our kids with board games while we chatted away for hours with them. Please note this is not paid to advertise, but the family was so welcoming that I cannot help but give them a special shoutout. They enlightened us on the History of Cyprus, and it was great to see people from South Cyprus and North Cyprus sitting together and having a good laugh. <o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRRbBKXRnoi83Acmgm2y7xHorUefegyUVJT-nQuxYd4SFvgtVP7IvMThCmCYiyemgILE1Me4wv80sfMbbVgxRjGGeiQC5KQMMlBSn5jOY-ZDt5Uutym4-BfYI0D1TazGWgltkpU_AX3px4tgS7OPZGsDMFCrtrT6sukZ7N-ifm_ioD-DxgOskdbqLU/s4032/IMG_2621.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRRbBKXRnoi83Acmgm2y7xHorUefegyUVJT-nQuxYd4SFvgtVP7IvMThCmCYiyemgILE1Me4wv80sfMbbVgxRjGGeiQC5KQMMlBSn5jOY-ZDt5Uutym4-BfYI0D1TazGWgltkpU_AX3px4tgS7OPZGsDMFCrtrT6sukZ7N-ifm_ioD-DxgOskdbqLU/s320/IMG_2621.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sedo Ice Cream</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Walks around cities are also recommended, each city has its own vibes, so go for it if you have time, especially in the evenings.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">We found Northern Cyprus to be more interesting, there was the Karpas Peninsula, which included encounters with sheep, donkeys and goats, and beautiful sights of cliffs, sea, golden beaches and the Monastery. Heading up to the monastery from the South, we also saw some beautiful mosques and abandoned churches, many of those churches were actually in a pitiful state, and this has to do with the history and politics of both Cyprus’. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There is the ghost city of Varosha in Famagusta. You cannot drive inside the ghost city, but it is permissible to park and walk around certain areas of Varosha. It is highly guarded; filming and photos are prohibited, and warnings are visible all around. The city is surrounded by barbed wires and is guarded by soldiers. The city was a highly sought resort like Ayia Napa, but due to politics, the whole city had to be abandoned by Greek Cypriots who moved to the South. The city will give you a bitter-sweet feeling, bitter as it feels eerie and sad, sweet as you will not find this sight anywhere else. It is a reminder of how politics dehumanise us. For me as someone who campaigns against the illegal settlement of Israelis in Palestinian homes, this hit hard. <o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Not far from Varosha, you will find the Walled city. The city still contains many old buildings, but is mainly a tourist area with shops and restaurants, but should be on your list of things to see. The Lala Moustafa Pasa Mosque/Saint Nicholas Cathedral is situated there. This is an old Cathedral that was converted into a mosque and is still used as a mosque. It is free to visit but you must be fully clothed. This is like seeing the reverse of Cordoba Mezquita or Seville Cathedral in Spain.<o:p></o:p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqtKpTMVk7DyuXr62AQxa6F8GXhIn6Op9I3qaEbh_X8RUMKbmS0US8yWnNU0hiEBCWCZTtLEDX66l7uZ1R8FRt2bYoOacG9YapOFWpoKrG20ZecPiGn2BVIQQPvlvLmhMHdiMgK2Fm_X8N83NpGtTq5C5uVftfhqV9BWkRMDX7kHQZvqTFqigGMzuH/s4032/IMG_2587.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqtKpTMVk7DyuXr62AQxa6F8GXhIn6Op9I3qaEbh_X8RUMKbmS0US8yWnNU0hiEBCWCZTtLEDX66l7uZ1R8FRt2bYoOacG9YapOFWpoKrG20ZecPiGn2BVIQQPvlvLmhMHdiMgK2Fm_X8N83NpGtTq5C5uVftfhqV9BWkRMDX7kHQZvqTFqigGMzuH/s320/IMG_2587.HEIC" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lala Moustafa Pasa Cami</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Further up on the eastern coast you will come across the Salamis ruins. It costs 1 euro for a child to visit, and 2.50 for an adult. Note that they will accept both Turkish Lira and Euros everywhere in Northern Cyprus.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Northern Cyprus looks very deserted in many places, driving along the north coast we saw many abandoned estates, with bungalows fully erected or partially built abandoned mid-construction. We later learnt that those buildings were bought/built by EU citizens who had to abandon claim to those as they were dragged to EU courts through South Cyprus. So if you are a European citizen thinking about investing there, do your research or you might lose everything.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Along the northern coast, you will also come across the Turtle Conservatory area in Northern Cyprus. We saw sea turtle nests in both Northern and South Cyprus, but unfortunately no turtles. The turtles come out at night, and it is prohibited to visit the area at night-time as the sea turtles get disturbed and disorientated by light. There are certain night visits that are arranged by an organisation, but we did not pursue this route.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Also along the coast, you will find Kyrennia/ Girne, a cute little port city, nice for a little stroll and you can also visit the castle. There are also Hillarion Castle ruins not too far from there which have a beautiful view.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Heading back more South (though still in Northern Cyprus), you will come across Nicosia, the last divided city in the world. Nicosia also has an old walled city which you can drive or walk around. There is also the Sellimiye Mosque but it has been closed for the past two years, this is another Cathedral that has been converted into a mosque.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b> </b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b>Crossing the borders<o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There are different places to cross the border, and we crossed over through three different borders. Depending on where you are staying, choose the border close to you. We stayed in Larnaca whilst visiting Northern Cyprus, the nearest border to us was Permagasos. It is a very small border unlike Nicosia’s and is not very busy. The borders at Nicosia and Famagusta were busier. Some of the borders such as the one in Famagusta are owned by the UK, the UK forces still hold 3% of Cyprus. Permagasos had only one check post by the Turks, unlike Nicosia where you have to pass two check-in posts, one owned by the Turks and the other by the Greeks. It was very easy to cross over, we only had to show our passports and buy insurance for the car there. Note if you buy anything from Northern Cyprus to take to the South, there is an 85 euros limit to shopping and you might get stopped for a car check. We did not buy anything, but the Turkish side was by far cheaper, even to fill up petrol or for food. We were asked about cigarettes and alcohol; I assume there is some sort of limit or prohibition.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA8ZXgeF15AGhHjgsni9kPeu4QoG8Syaoz3rZVrL4DB2Svn7PqyRf2ww1qn7cEUF6FL-yu-0YbP2o-Q3nl5qQFlZ-X6Q3pBUq8HSgC-dsAa3cTo2eu7mnOjDScUGq6mqxR8jCEfzU0ixVyYskIeOwjtzA1QyKxYtC5NxA6LEFv6ZW8H85qn0S9IXqB/s4032/IMG_2433.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA8ZXgeF15AGhHjgsni9kPeu4QoG8Syaoz3rZVrL4DB2Svn7PqyRf2ww1qn7cEUF6FL-yu-0YbP2o-Q3nl5qQFlZ-X6Q3pBUq8HSgC-dsAa3cTo2eu7mnOjDScUGq6mqxR8jCEfzU0ixVyYskIeOwjtzA1QyKxYtC5NxA6LEFv6ZW8H85qn0S9IXqB/s320/IMG_2433.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Donkeys in Karpass Peninsula</td></tr></tbody></table><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><b>Food<o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">There are Fish taverns everywhere, and that’s where the locals eat. One of my daughters has a shellfish so we avoided those. As Muslims, we also are limited in what we can eat. Ocean Basket have restaurants in all cities, and they are a good choice, advertised as a luxury seafood restaurant, the grilled octopus is to die for! We have visited Ocean Basket in many countries, it is always a hit. Additionally, for those looking for Halal food, there is not much, we found a few places in Paphos but they were not worth it. Limassol had a good Muslim population but all restaurants also serve Pork. We ate at Cleopatra where the owner assured us that Pork dishes are prepared and cooked in a separate area of the kitchen, the food was definitely amazing, and there were certain Lebanese dishes on the menu that we never saw in Lebanese restaurants in the UK, like the Chilli Kofte. Larnaca had an Arabic shop and we bought some halal meat which I cooked as we were self-catered. There was also a few Halal restaurants. Otherwise, the pastries at Lidl never failed to impress.<o:p></o:p></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAnIwY2BMlR8uF_JKV9ZB0H0m3ZD4xo9FmzGwM9jMUnfEdWFu7VHjj96xB66izZyhi2lWbRVUgLOgq7S6FQRRaWdl30yn98_CiKjWS0y1nYGoDjZvSLr5zVnUYSeR75z3js4abOSfdZekqqyAEyrXazYUcu1-4lHXITJpRqqjk27SuhkdV2nUNaS-4/s4032/IMG_2060.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAnIwY2BMlR8uF_JKV9ZB0H0m3ZD4xo9FmzGwM9jMUnfEdWFu7VHjj96xB66izZyhi2lWbRVUgLOgq7S6FQRRaWdl30yn98_CiKjWS0y1nYGoDjZvSLr5zVnUYSeR75z3js4abOSfdZekqqyAEyrXazYUcu1-4lHXITJpRqqjk27SuhkdV2nUNaS-4/s320/IMG_2060.HEIC" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ocean Basket</td></tr></tbody></table><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Food in Northern Cyprus was much easier to find for us. Everything was Halal. We were told by some locals that Niazi is a great place to eat at. If you are in Kyrennia or Nicosia. Having eaten at Niazi already in Kyrennia, we wanted to try something different and were recommended Ezci. The place blew us away, the menu had about 30 pages, and all dishes looked exceptional. We each ordered a dish thinking it would be a small plate, to our surprise each plate turned out to be a platter, and there was so much left over that we had enough food for another meal the next day.<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;"><o:p> <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqGiz16ClTBsvQLBaK6SgLoE_foE9X-l1ByhhgL5detwQQIsnnnRyyRrVT375o9NtV9Ks_Bidut6qGJhHAzQ0ame2R_4bCVH6IZUnVw0PAfQ790-bjSA_y8Jm3HeIW49XzmZ2_P6LD-YOZpNzYl_lCmgZtY9hN-TXfUb1NbjgxGTdjHsSBTq8oariq/s4032/IMG_2514.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqGiz16ClTBsvQLBaK6SgLoE_foE9X-l1ByhhgL5detwQQIsnnnRyyRrVT375o9NtV9Ks_Bidut6qGJhHAzQ0ame2R_4bCVH6IZUnVw0PAfQ790-bjSA_y8Jm3HeIW49XzmZ2_P6LD-YOZpNzYl_lCmgZtY9hN-TXfUb1NbjgxGTdjHsSBTq8oariq/s320/IMG_2514.HEIC" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kyrenia Harbour</td></tr></tbody></table><br /></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify;">Cyprus is a great place to visit, it can be hot and humid, so definitely make sure there is air conditioning wherever you are staying during the summer. It snows in certain areas in winter, so if you are planning a winter visit then be ready for the cold weather. Everybody drinks bottled water, although we saw a few reservoirs, there was also a desalinated plant in Larnaca, so we would recommend not drinking tap water. The people are very friendly in both the North and the South, they are possibly the most honest people (not much tourist trap) we have come across, and I believe the crime rate must be low there as we saw people living their doors wide open, and we were even told to leave the keys in the doors in the house when checking out. <o:p></o:p></p><br />
PS: As somebody suffering from ailurophobia (phobia of cats), I must admit it was not too bad, just avoid being around restaurants at night and ask to eat in restaurants. Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-23146379720384520952018-03-22T12:14:00.000-07:002019-03-20T14:30:46.624-07:00Tips from a Single Muslim Mum TravelsAs a young girl growing up I always loved adventures and going to new places, discovering new things and eating different types of food.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FEIo6hrlSdk/WrP711wZkcI/AAAAAAAAASM/1hDUHTmOCkoV-C3q70-suL9ZLJ648Hf5QCLcBGAs/s1600/portugal1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FEIo6hrlSdk/WrP711wZkcI/AAAAAAAAASM/1hDUHTmOCkoV-C3q70-suL9ZLJ648Hf5QCLcBGAs/s320/portugal1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I always thought one day when I will have a partner we will do this together and explore the world. Unfortunately, it didn't quite work out that way, but I found great companionship in my little travellers.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-V_X03cqXWME/WrP7xjl7sxI/AAAAAAAAARk/DP4omdx_75kWJoOxYmVx-iDnRtYFg_1hACLcBGAs/s1600/malta1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-V_X03cqXWME/WrP7xjl7sxI/AAAAAAAAARk/DP4omdx_75kWJoOxYmVx-iDnRtYFg_1hACLcBGAs/s320/malta1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
As soon as I got my driving license and the car was sorted, my family knew I would hit the road, and hit it, I did! I went straight on the motorways and I was off visiting different parts of UK with my little munchkins saddled in the back, in their car seats. Every weekend meant an opportunity to explore new places - I would finish my job during the week and sometimes we would leave on Friday night itself to go and visit family and friends, as well as places we had no connection with.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rFsOkl58qR8/WrP7xGjkj5I/AAAAAAAAARc/zlHXoQWMcrYlAr2URxbjreyiuW6CNpi0gCLcBGAs/s1600/malta2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rFsOkl58qR8/WrP7xGjkj5I/AAAAAAAAARc/zlHXoQWMcrYlAr2URxbjreyiuW6CNpi0gCLcBGAs/s320/malta2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
My kids who must have been about 1 and 2 when I bought my car are gypsies, just like me, they grew up always travelling and never complain about the journeys or being bored. We do not have any ipads or TV in the car so all they get to do is look outside the window, do some colouring and now that they are older, they can read a book.<br />
Exploring UK isn't enough, even though I always had spare clothes, shoes and toiletries packed in the car for all UK weather and a tent (just in case- you never know), we needed something new, it was time to venture outside the country and explore other places.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w374qKfNKgI/WrP7z8tWFiI/AAAAAAAAAR4/lFxxmi1uCa4lWenRlq-OIsYLOEA4DQMbQCLcBGAs/s1600/mauritius1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w374qKfNKgI/WrP7z8tWFiI/AAAAAAAAAR4/lFxxmi1uCa4lWenRlq-OIsYLOEA4DQMbQCLcBGAs/s320/mauritius1.jpg" width="240" /></a>Our first holiday was to Mauritius ( back home), I thought about the logistics - it would be easier, I had family and friends there who could help out etc. So off I went with a 2 toddlers. It was an amazing experience, but also a very exhausting experience. We had a 6 hour flight from UK to Dubai, an 8 hour wait in Dubai airport and another 6 hours flight to Mauritius- we were absolutely exhausted. It was also not the best of flights, both flights were packed, I had the 1 year old on me who was annoyed at not having a seat of her own, the 2 year old was not happy that her TV screen was not working, they were both fighting over who should watch the TV as we had one to share between the three of us, and to top it up, I had a grumpy man in the seat in front of us who was not amused about having toddlers sat behind him. I guess it should have really put me off, but my love for travelling was greater than the obstacle we faced!<br />
<br />
<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Tip for parents with babies and toddlers: For your first travel, just go somewhere close by a 2-4 hours flight and with minimum baggage, do not have a transit!</b><br />
<br />
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-nKK8FT5F49s/WrP7yh--WnI/AAAAAAAAARs/nU_2MagnsyUhLTpNnSQZJhWUvzcSFKfpACLcBGAs/s1600/malta4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-nKK8FT5F49s/WrP7yh--WnI/AAAAAAAAARs/nU_2MagnsyUhLTpNnSQZJhWUvzcSFKfpACLcBGAs/s320/malta4.jpg" width="320" /></a>The next year, after this exhausting experience, I decided to take them somewhere closer and (cheaper)! We set out for Turkey this time to enjoyed a somewhat relaxing holiday. Obviously it was never going to be relaxing with me planning it. We had lots of activities every day- the girls who had been having swimming lessons for a year now loved it! It was warm with lots of tours for us to do everyday for just £10 a day including lunch- no planning and driving required. We even went for a boat trip where my eldest who was just 3 jumped off a double decker boat into the sea- almost giving me a heart attack- she did have her armbands on and there were other people swimming already off the boat. So, off I went along with the 2 year old swimming in the middle of the ocean. This was definitely something I never planned on, and would definitely never have done without them.<br />
<br />
I was more confident about taking them abroad at this point, and every holiday they would ask if we are going anywhere warm and fun.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-G0TzXaRBOWY/WrP70PZOICI/AAAAAAAAAR8/iop-8pZDB8EZiRkZFpK2T0YDfkWivWi6gCLcBGAs/s1600/mauritius2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-G0TzXaRBOWY/WrP70PZOICI/AAAAAAAAAR8/iop-8pZDB8EZiRkZFpK2T0YDfkWivWi6gCLcBGAs/s200/mauritius2.jpg" width="150" /></a><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-590zmJ_KZeo/WrP7xyuvBFI/AAAAAAAAARo/4o7ECtFVb6UoJA_H5EetoNj3lmOSdWHHgCLcBGAs/s1600/malta3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="200" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-590zmJ_KZeo/WrP7xyuvBFI/AAAAAAAAARo/4o7ECtFVb6UoJA_H5EetoNj3lmOSdWHHgCLcBGAs/s200/malta3.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I had driven previously in Mauritius before ( and UK), but I have never driven on an unknown territory, so for our next adventure, it made sense for me to add some more driving experience. So off we went to Malta <span style="text-align: center;">to climb the Azure Window ( which now doesn't exist anymore) and for much more, such as mouthwatering seafood.</span><br />
<br />
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VE0fKySDiKA/WrP7zeN-E_I/AAAAAAAAARw/UedEGBzGfUcv-wrmbNl3Q0Uwq_RrKDGtgCLcBGAs/s1600/malta6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="960" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VE0fKySDiKA/WrP7zeN-E_I/AAAAAAAAARw/UedEGBzGfUcv-wrmbNl3Q0Uwq_RrKDGtgCLcBGAs/s320/malta6.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-o8sGYBmzaiI/WrP71NJruAI/AAAAAAAAASE/lrQqcgQw8KgmapE6R6RT2rOzF3wNSPcfQCLcBGAs/s1600/mauritius3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-o8sGYBmzaiI/WrP71NJruAI/AAAAAAAAASE/lrQqcgQw8KgmapE6R6RT2rOzF3wNSPcfQCLcBGAs/s320/mauritius3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Our last holiday was to the Algarve, Portugal. We were very limited on time, we left UK Monday evening and our flight back was Friday afternoon, which pretty much left us with only 3 days to drive all around the Algarve but....we did it!- 3 days and we had driven around the west coast, the south cost, the mountains and up the river separating Portugal from Spain.<br />
<br />
As a single mum I am proud of all our adventures and I know that I'm making memories we will all cherish one day.<br />
<br />
<b></b><br />
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b>The most important thing about travelling with children is planning</b>, and for me: keeping the cost low. We normally <b>stay in B&B or airbnb, it keeps the cost low </b>but we have been very lucky and have pretty much managed to book self-catered accommodation at relatively cheap price with swimming pools. <b>Check for cheap flights by budget airlines</b>, there is no need for priority booking, don't book any extras unless you need it, <b>most flights will allow you to take car seats, boosters and pushchairs free of charge</b> (check with your airline before booking).<b> Research on different websites for accommodation- check the prices out, check the facilities offered such as parking, swimming pool</b>- you would be surprised at what you could find! We even had a jacuzzi at no additional cost!<br />
<br />
<b></b><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<b><a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wEtjv2thGNw/WrP7xoPqiuI/AAAAAAAAARg/JwMfcZScgkYmLe0A84va2n6U7WL2JHj3wCLcBGAs/s1600/Portugal2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wEtjv2thGNw/WrP7xoPqiuI/AAAAAAAAARg/JwMfcZScgkYmLe0A84va2n6U7WL2JHj3wCLcBGAs/s320/Portugal2.jpg" width="320" /></a></b></div>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_SyUfeWCiHU/WrP77Vk6a2I/AAAAAAAAASc/KSx0hLNGwN4394nVBDESabZeUNcEKKSdQCLcBGAs/s1600/turkey1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_SyUfeWCiHU/WrP77Vk6a2I/AAAAAAAAASc/KSx0hLNGwN4394nVBDESabZeUNcEKKSdQCLcBGAs/s320/turkey1.jpg" width="240" /></a><b><br /></b></b><br />
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b><b><br /></b></b>
<b>Make a list of the places you want to visit,</b> if you are staying in different places, check out all the places of interests in all the places, write them down, print a map of the areas you are to visit, calculate how long it will take from one place to the other, find information about <b>places to eat (especially Halal places) and compare the prices as well as check the ratings on trip advisor.</b> Go on google maps and check the areas using the satellites, find landmarks so when you are driving around you know you are in the right place. Satnavs can be tricky to work out in some countries, so it's advisable to<b> have your own printed map.</b><br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dz4bzc2HLV8/WrP70uLUVkI/AAAAAAAAASA/q6xKwCE4x1s0V0jBNIeK_HQ2Ex7Nm0YmQCLcBGAs/s1600/mauritius4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dz4bzc2HLV8/WrP70uLUVkI/AAAAAAAAASA/q6xKwCE4x1s0V0jBNIeK_HQ2Ex7Nm0YmQCLcBGAs/s320/mauritius4.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
If you have kids, you will know they are always hungry and thirsty, <b>make your first stop to a supermarket and buy as much snacks and drinks as possible </b>so you don't have to stop every now and then, especially for long journeys and always always ask them to go toilet- whether they need it or not!<br />
<br />
<b>Many places to visit are free for under 10</b>, so add those places to your list! <b>Always carry your passport</b>- some places are free to visit for EU citizens and if you have<b> a student card, it can always be a bonus.</b><br />
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-biGvgLvy6o4/WrP756qABQI/AAAAAAAAASQ/ok02C3DzM407HGXQ2Jx3vD__lEJXjT9-QCLcBGAs/s1600/turkey2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-biGvgLvy6o4/WrP756qABQI/AAAAAAAAASQ/ok02C3DzM407HGXQ2Jx3vD__lEJXjT9-QCLcBGAs/s320/turkey2.jpg" width="320" /></a><b><br /></b>
I am currently planning our next holiday, and one thing I did realise while planning on this one, is that some places which normally charge you for a visit would be free for adults and children on certain days of the week, so try to <b>see if you can be visit on the 'free days'</b>. Also, <b>look at the festivals </b>taking place around the time of your visit, you will get more of the local feel and culture.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dGOwXewCWe0/WrP77a-VpGI/AAAAAAAAASY/MKDa0KT-gIgPAWO1dJ3I5Me_tWVmid_XwCLcBGAs/s1600/turkey6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dGOwXewCWe0/WrP77a-VpGI/AAAAAAAAASY/MKDa0KT-gIgPAWO1dJ3I5Me_tWVmid_XwCLcBGAs/s320/turkey6.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
One massive word of advice is <b>research a lot about the car hire company, a lot of them will try to scam you</b>- always read the terms and conditions before booking. I've had to learn this from some horrible experience with certain companies and avoid a certain Europe based company which is definitely not selling any gold (read between the lines)!<br />
<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Remember this is meant to be fun for all</b>, plan way ahead so you don't stress over things and work out a timetable of what you want to see on which day and how long will all this take. I love visiting historical buildings, but I know my kids my kids won't like it as much so go to places where you can do a bit of both, where they can have some relaxing time at the beach but where you can also go to places of interest.<br />
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1-BE-O_KHic/WrP76Z-kdpI/AAAAAAAAASU/STe4HxJ_DMY1mHRr401En8Yk_0el5QcpwCLcBGAs/s1600/turkey3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1-BE-O_KHic/WrP76Z-kdpI/AAAAAAAAASU/STe4HxJ_DMY1mHRr401En8Yk_0el5QcpwCLcBGAs/s320/turkey3.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><br /></b>
<b><br /></b>
<b><br /></b>
<b>If a single Muslim mum can do it on her own, so can you!</b><br />
<br />Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-11796131265067476282017-11-14T15:59:00.003-08:002017-11-14T16:06:15.533-08:00Sahabiyyah- 7 Things Modern Muslim Women can learn from Umm Umara/Nusaybah bint Ka'ab (r.a)<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Sahabiyyah for modern Muslim women (continues)</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I previously wrote about Khadija bint Khuwaylid (r.a), who was known for her strength in character. We shall now look at another woman who is known for her physical strength.</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-B0OoLmzIfP8/WguDOG6o_8I/AAAAAAAAAQU/-8tTcvq2iEY-rEbNhq-q_m3EctzCrYl3gCLcBGAs/s1600/archery.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-B0OoLmzIfP8/WguDOG6o_8I/AAAAAAAAAQU/-8tTcvq2iEY-rEbNhq-q_m3EctzCrYl3gCLcBGAs/s320/archery.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"><b>Who is Nusaybah (r.a)?</b></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was a mujahidda - someone who strive in the path of Allah.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Why is she a role-mode?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nusaybah was one of the many female Sahabiyyah who was known not only for her emotional strength but also for her physical prowess in the battlefield.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She had been married twice and all her sons were shaheeds (martyrs).</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was one of the 2 women from Al-Ansar who made the trip to Madina for umrah and to pledge her allegiance to the prophet Muhammad (s.a.w)</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"><b></b></span><br /></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"><b>What can we learn from her?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">1. Courage and bravery is for women too</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Umm Umara is known to have shown tremendous courage, and maybe the reason she is most known for is the fact that she has been described by the prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) as being one of the strongest people on the battlefield, particularly for the battle of Uhud.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She had participated in most of the battles during the prophet’s time and continued to support other battles after the death of the prophet (s.a.w).</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The prophet said ‘whenever I looked to the right or left I saw her fighting in front of me’. She became the shield of the prophet Muhammad (saw) in the battle of Uhud .</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The story goes that Nusabah was only meant to be handing out water in the battle of Uhud, and the prophet had given orders to the army to remain on the hills, but the army did not listen and as a result, the enemy took advantage of this and attacked. A lot of sahabas fled, many of whom were men. Seeing this, Nusaybah decided instead of picking buckets of water to pick up a sword and fight to save Allah’s messenger. She was fearless, she didn’t have a shield and did not care about her own safety- her priority was to protect the prophet at all cost, including her own life.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>The prophet never failed to compare her courage as being the better than<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>men at the battle of Uhud.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">When one of the male companions was running away to save his own life, the prophet (s.a.w) shouted to him to throw his shield to Nusaybah who so far had been fighting just with a sword and without a shield. This shows how much courage she did have indeed.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nusaybah had many wounds in many a battle, but during the battle of Uhud she sustained 13 wounds, one of which was a very deep cut on her neck which took 1 whole year to heal.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">In another battle, she lost her wrist and became disabled yet that did not stop her to fight with other parts of her body.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">This is a true imagery of courage and bravery and shows us how to face adversity in life, be it at work, in the house or outside.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">2. Sacrificing in the cause of Allah</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nusaybah stands for sacrifice - the moment she became a Muslim, she dedicated to sacrifice everything in her life to Islam , including her own children.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">During the battle of Uhud, many men fled and only around 10 people stayed behind to protect the prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) and 40% of the people who stayed belonged to Nusaybah’s family. The story does not speak about 40% being part of a man’s family but of a woman’s family. This shows how strong of a woman she was, that the men in her family was recognised by her presence!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nusaybah had 3 sons who all became shaheeds. Upon hearing about the death of her son Habib, she is reported to have said ‘it was for such a situation I prepared them’- meaning she raised them to be sacrificed in the way of Allah.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Habib was sent by the prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) as a messenger to Musaylam Al Khazaab- a powerful imposter who claimed prophethood. Along with Habib, another sahaba was sent. When they got Musaylam, he asked them 2 questions repeatedly:</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Who is Muhammad?’</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Who am I?’</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The first sahaba, fearing for is life<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>replied you are a messenger of Allah to Musaylam.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Habib, well-trained by his mum, on the other hand was not scared. He was merely a messenger but he was not going to deny the truth.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">He answered Muhammad (s.a.w) is the messenger of Allah.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">And for the second question, his reply was always ‘I can’t hear you.’</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Every time he said I can’t hear you, Musaylam ordered for him to be cut in pieces. And yet, he had the same answer everytime, and when they were done cutting him, they burnt him.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Rather than feeling sadness upon hearing that, Nusaybah was proud of her son and knew she had raised him right. She set the example for all mothers.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was not the mother of just one shaheed but of 3. Her dua (prayer) was for her and her family to be reunited in Jannah with the prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). Dua which the prophet confirmed to be accepted.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Her other son Abdullah finally in the end killed Musaylam and avenged the death of his brother. Allah gave her this right in the Dunya ( this world) itself for justice rather than in Akhirah.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Her sons Abdullah and Damra also died in other battles.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">What could be more important to a mother than the life of her children? Yet this woman did not flinch to sacrifice her own flesh and blood in the way of Allah.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">3. Resilience and steadfastness is a sign of womanhood</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was steadfast- even after many injuries and battles she did not give up. She carried on fighting for Islam, losing her own body part, losing her own children- yet she never gave up.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">In one of the battles, her son got hurt and the prophet (s.a.w) ordered her to go and tend to him, which she did dutifully. Once her son was in a better position, she said to him ‘get up and fight’. She loved her children and she cared for them, but she was a Muslim before everything else.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The prophet is reported to have said to her following all her injuries and losses, ‘Who can bear what you can bear Umm Umara?’</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The prophet himself was amazed by her bravery and courage. No, he was not praising a man, but a woman for being physically and emotionally strong.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">4. Having priorities is a must</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">At the battle of Uhud, she was meant to be merely handing out water to the fighters. She knew what her ‘job’ was but when she saw the men deserting the prophet (s.a.w) - she also knew what her priority was. Her aim and objective was to protect the life of the prophet (s.a.w) and Islam. So, instead of doing her ‘job’. She took the initiative proactively to defend the prophet (s.a.w) instead.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There is a saying- we need to choose our battles and this is exactly what she did.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">5. Show our love for Allah and his prophet (s.a.w)</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There is no denying her love for Allah and his prophet (s.a.w). The prophet saw this through out his life and so did his companions. This woman who was picking a sword for the first time stood without armour and shield and sustained injury after injury just to protect the prophet (s.a.w) when most men had deserted him to save their own lives!</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">How many people will sacrifice themselves for the deen? We cannot even sacrifice anything as our love for our nafs are so strong. We mould ourselves to please people rather than Allah and his messenger.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">6. We should earn the respect of both men and women</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was not only respected and admired by the women but also by the men. After the death of the prophet (s.a.w) she and her family carried on to play important roles in Islam. She earned, gave and commanded respect. She showed not only a woman has intelligence but also physical strength when and as required.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She is a role model for all of us women to teach our daughters to take on martial arts and other physical activities to make them stronger. She showed us that not only men are fighters, but women can too- we not only can defend ourselves but others too! After all, she is the one who protected the prophet (s.a.w) with Allah’s permission.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;"><br /></b></div>
<div class="p2">
<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial;">7. Women’s rights</b><span class="s1"></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nusaybah was not only fierce on the battlefield, but she was also sharp with her tongue.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She told the Prophet (s.a.w) that she is only hearing about men in the Quran then the following verse<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>was revealed:</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Verily, the Muslims men and women, the believers men and women, the men and the women who are obedient to Allah, the men and women who are truthful, the men and women who are patient, the men and women who are humble, the men and women who give Sadaqat (Zakat), the men and women who observe fast, the men and the women who guard their chastity (from illegal sexual acts), and the men and women who remember Allah much with their hearts and tongues, Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward (Paradise)’ (33:35)</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Don’t be scared to ask Allah and complain about your situation. He is ever-listening and have hope your dues and complaints are being heard by the one who can make everything possible.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Possibly, she is the first woman to ask for women’s right!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"><b>7 things we can learn form Umm Umara/Nusaybah bit Ka’ab</b></span></div>
<div class="p4">
<span class="s1"><b></b></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 12.0px Arial; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 12.0px Arial; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 14.0px}
p.p3 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 14.0px Arial; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p4 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 14.0px Arial; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 16.0px}
li.li1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 12.0px Arial; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
span.s2 {font: 12.0px Helvetica}
ol.ol1 {list-style-type: decimal}
</style>
<br />
<ol class="ol1">
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Courage and bravery is for women too</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Sacrificing in the cause of Allah</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Resilience and steadfastness is a sign of womanhood</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Having priorities is a must</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Show our love for Allah and his prophet (s.a.w)</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">We should earn the respect of both men and women</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s2"></span><span class="s1">Women’s rights</span></li>
</ol>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-87223771923286353872017-11-07T15:26:00.002-08:002017-11-07T15:26:30.295-08:0012 Things modern Muslim women can learn from Khadija bint Khuwaylid (r.a)<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Whenever we are trying to look for a female role-model in Islam, we often are pointed in the direction of how a wonderful wife, daughter and mother the Sahabiyyah were. Nowadays, more than ever we need to know what other roles did they play other than perfecting their role as a mother, daughter and wife. What did they do for themselves? What made them an asset to the society they were living in? How did they contribute to raising the status of women in Islam outside their households?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I will be dedicating a series of blogs to the Sahabiyyah and the roles they played outside their relationship with the men in their families to show that us women do have role models we can look up to in order to aspire us to become the best for ourselves.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-7rXevBeK-ew/WgJA1xgNIdI/AAAAAAAAAP0/ez_Fqh9hKHoHWruz2i3LjWcOUBklyaH1QCLcBGAs/s1600/khadija.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="600" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-7rXevBeK-ew/WgJA1xgNIdI/AAAAAAAAAP0/ez_Fqh9hKHoHWruz2i3LjWcOUBklyaH1QCLcBGAs/s320/khadija.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b>Who is<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>Khadija (r.a)?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"><b></b></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The first wife of the prophet (saw) and the only one till her death.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She is the only wife to have given him children.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The first revert/convert to Islam.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"><b></b></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b>Who was Khadijah (r.a) before she married the prophet (saw)?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija bint Khuwaylid was the daughter of a noble and rich businessman of the Quraysh. She was highly sought<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>after for marriage due to the high status of her father<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>and she had been married twice before she married the prophet Muhammad (saw).</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija had been married and was a widow, having inherited the money of her late husbands. It is said her second husband was very rich, and after his death, she inherited all of his money and business.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija was a smart woman brought up in a house of a smart and intelligent businessman and undoubtedly benefitted from her father’s knowledge and know-how in the business world.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was known as Ameerat-Quraysh (“Princess of Quraysh”) and al-Tahira (“The Pure One”) and was a fierce business competitor in a world ruled by men.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She knew how to handle her business single-handedly and appointed many a man to take care of her business dealings which involved a lot of travelling, and which may have been obstacle for her due to her being also a single mother and having the care of her children.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija(r.a) was very clever and could tell she was being swindled by the men she appointed to do the business deals, which involved travelling and trading goods in different parts of the country/world. She knew she was making more profit, but it was not coming back to her as those men would lie about the profit they were making.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She wanted someone honest and she heard about Muhammad Al-Ameen (saw) through her sister, who had previously employed him. Khadijah (r.a), upon hearing about him decided to appoint him as a salesman; but she was also a very intelligent woman, reason being she also sent her servant along with him to make sure she received appropriate feedback about him. She was not one to be conned!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The servant could not stop praising Muhammad (saw) and how he dealt with other people fairly and the manner in which he conducted his business. Moreover, Khadija(r.a) knew she has finally found the honest man she has been looking to conduct her business as she had never made as much profit before with any other salesman.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b>How did she propose to the prophet Muhammad (saw)?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We consider ourselves to be living in a ‘modern’ world yet many of us would find it ‘inappropriate’ to approach a man and propose to him.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija (r.a) was not one of those women - she knew what she wanted and she set out to work on getting what she wanted.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was a confident woman, who believed in herself and had the courage to send a marriage proposal to Muhammad (saw) for herself.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was also a noble woman, and as such, she could not approach him directly to ask the question but instead sent her sister to do the job. She had the courage and yet the shyness (hayah) to ask him for his hand.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was a rich woman, who even though widowed twice and being a single mother was constantly being showered with marriage proposals from the most affluent men, yet she was not attracted to the money and name of those people. She was a fine woman who could see deeper than that which meets the eye - she had a vision of a better future, a peaceful and happy life with a man who would be her partner and complete her in every aspect of life.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Muhammad (saw) had been a shepherd and he was living with his uncle at that time and did not have any place of his own - he could not afford a wife with whatever he was making and he was not looking into getting married as he knew he would not be able to provide for one fairly. Khadijah (r.a) overlooked this - she did not need a man to save her finances, she needed a man who knew his priorities and was ready to work hard and honestly to meet his needs. She saw what he could do and believed in him even before she married him. She could see that his honesty was going to be the basis of a worthy relationship. Although she had previously decided she had enough of marriages following her two marriages, she knew he was worth it as he was an honest and trustworthy man - a man that deserves to be loved and cared for even though his financial status was not the best!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">When told it is Khadija bint Khuwaylid (r.a) that was seeking his hand, the prophet (saw) was shocked - The princess of the Quraysh wanted to marry a poor shepherd! He did not think he was worthy of her, but obviously being the strong woman she was - she wanted him as a companion and she made this clear by sending her sister to ask his hand in marriage. She was determined - she knew what she wanted and she was out to get it, even when the man in question himself had doubts! His poverty did not scare him, nor did the fact she is richer than him make her question whether a man would be willing to live under his wife’s wings.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b>Who was Khadija (r.a) as the wife of the prophet (saw)?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Khadija (r.a) believed in Muhammad (saw) even when he did not believe in himself. She knew he was the prophet even before he accepted this fact. She was his rock! She was also the one to give him a shoulder to cry on, to give him support and to hold his hand.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She was not just his wife, but she was his best friend, his confident, the one who made him stronger when he felt weak. This shows how emotionally strong she was as a woman. In most relationships, it is the man who plays the ‘strong’ character, but we can clearly see in their love story -<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>Khadija (r.a) was the one who made Muhammad (saw) even stronger.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She believed so much in Allah and his prophet (saw) that she spent all her wealth in the cause of Allah - doing charity and supporting Muslims through thick and thin.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>This shows how selfless she was, she was a giver and gave everything away even when Allah blessed her with immense wealth. She was not scared of being poor even though she always had a comfortable life - she stood for the truth and faced it by staying constantly at her husband’s side.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">What is special about Khadija (r.a)?</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Allah granted her the status of being the first convert/revert to Islam - a woman was chosen to be given this status.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">She is mentioned first in the Hadith related about the 4 best women in Islam due to her patience and resilience.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Allah himself sent her ‘salam’ through Jibril (a.s).</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The prophet Muhammad (saw) loved her more than any other wife.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"><b></b></span><br /></div>
<div class="p4">
<span class="s1"><b>12 reasons she is our role-model?</b></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">1. She is the Mother of the Believers.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">2. She was a strong, independent and self-reliant businesswoman.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">3. She was a clever woman with sound judgement.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">4. She was a successful business woman in a world ruled by men.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">5. She did not let the fact that she was a widow and single mother affect her career.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">6. She had a vision and a goal and she set out to get it.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">7. She loved selflessly and dedicated her wealth to others.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">8. She was the rock for the man in her life.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">9. She thought with her brain as well as her heart.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">10. She was daring, yet respectful.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">11. She was not scared of challenges.</span></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
p.p3 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 16.0px}
p.p4 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">12. She was not looking for a saviour in a man.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-16041252798845340792017-11-02T15:15:00.002-07:002017-11-02T15:15:48.647-07:00Instilling gratitude in Children<h3>
<span class="s1"><b>" If you are grateful, He is pleased with you..." (Az-Zumar 39:7).</b> </span></h3>
<h4>
<span class="s1">These are the words of Allah, he promised us that if we show gratitude to Him, we would not be among the losers.</span></h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w_ao5LP5bWA/WfuZBMyWV8I/AAAAAAAAAPg/e_tDLOYd7ksppMoP8h6rl0RneBBDEY5SwCLcBGAs/s1600/henrywardbeecher1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="600" height="168" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w_ao5LP5bWA/WfuZBMyWV8I/AAAAAAAAAPg/e_tDLOYd7ksppMoP8h6rl0RneBBDEY5SwCLcBGAs/s320/henrywardbeecher1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">In a world becoming increasingly materialistic, how do we go about raising children who are grateful for what they have? For what has been bestowed to them by Allah’s blessings?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I am a teacher by profession and I have worked with children from the age of 4 to 16 in the past 9 years or so - I have experienced dealing with Muslims and non-Muslims children and as a matter of fact, gratitude is one of the things that over the years I have witnessed being on the decline among today’s youth.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Both my children are born and raised in a first world country where obviously they are surrounded by new technology, new toys and new gadgets - much of the materialistic things that today’s youngsters rely a lot on and consider a must.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Over 6 years ago when I realised I was pregnant with my first child, I had just bought a brand new flat screen 40” TV. One of the first decision I made was to raise my child differently to the children I have been teaching in schools, I wanted to give her something different - my time!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I got rid of the brand new TV and then started my journey of motherhood. Only a few months after her birth, I found myself living as a single mother and also expecting a second child. The first few years of motherhood were the hardest as financially I was not in the best of situation and although I had found a more reliable job following the birth of my 2nd child, the pay was not the best but I was grateful to Allah for getting us through this tough patch.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I wanted my kids to realise how lucky and blessed we were that Allah made sure we had a roof on our head, food on our plates and clothes to wear. I started looking into how I could show my children that although we may not have the best of everything, what we do have is more than we need and Alhumdulillah I found a good and practical way of doing this.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One of my muslim friends started a homeless people project and asked me if I would help out. She was a divorcee and a revert with not much support herself, and who had upon her conversion to Islam experience some sort of homelessness herself. I asked her if she wouldn’t mind if I bring my daughters along (they were aged 2.5 and 3.5 then) as I thought it would be a good way of showing them what life is like for other people. So, we would cook and packed food as well as prepare hygiene packs which had the basic items for grooming and hygiene for the homeless people. Every<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>Saturday evening, when<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>people were getting ready for their night outs, we would load our handbags with foods and those survival packs to give out to people. I would rarely hand out any of them, but rather used to let my daughters to do it - the people they gave the things to were obviously dressed<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>in rags - old, stained, dirty and smelly clothes. They were not the most appealing<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>looking people - some have not had a hair cuts in months, others have not showered in quite a while and so on. You can pretty much portray the beggars from any old English movie you have seen - many did look exactly like that! It was important for me to teach them that those people ’s appearances did not matter, and they were not ‘ugly’ but instead they were having a difficult time and they had nowhere to live, no where to sleep, no food to eat and so on. I wanted them to be aware of other people’s difficulties and pain so they could see how much better off we are and give thanks to Allah for all we have.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We had fluorescent jackets with the logo of the charity we were helping out and they were oversized for their tiny body, but they loved it - they loved being part of the crew and helping making a difference to other people’s lives. The homeless people were thankful to us for what were doing for them, but I was also thankful and grateful for them to teach my children about appreciating the blessings we have. My kids, even though very young obviously asked questions about what happened to them(the homeless people) and why we needed to help them etc - and this helped to develop empathy in them towards others.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One day, one of the homeless ladies who we had given some food asked me if I wouldn’t mind if she gives something to my kids and if she could hug them. She explained she has not seen her grand children in years and she would just like to hug them for making her day brighter. She had gotten a pack of sweets for them and wanted them to have it. As she gave it to them,I could spot a little tear rolling down the side of her eyes. Maybe my kids could not understand what this one hug meant to her, but I could and I am sure even though they were very young they could feel the love and warmth of that person. Unfortunately, we could not carry on with the project as there was not enough people to give us a hand but even till date - 2 years later, my kids still ask about ‘when are we going to feed the poor people’.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Another anecdote is the old lady selling Big Issue outside our local shop. For years there is this old lady (a refugee) who sells the Big Issue to earn some pennies in order to survive. Since my kids were babies, whenever I go shopping there , I make it a point to buy some extra food or drink item to give to her on our way out. Both my children know we always get her something, and when we are inside the shop, they will ask ‘Mummy can we get her this or that this time?’ I could not tell you how proud of them I feel whenever they do that - they love giving her her little something on the way out. The lady speaks no English, but she has come to recognise me and my daughters and she knows we will always get her something. My youngest once asked me why do we always buy the old lady stuff - I explained that Allah has given us enough to share with others so we can make them happy, then Allah feels happy and give us more.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One day, I was packing away old clothes to give to charity, my daughters walked in and asked me what I was doing - I told them I’m giving away their old clothes to the children who don’t have clothes to wear as their mummy and daddy cannot buy any. My eldest said, ‘What about toys Mummy? Do they have toys?’ I said they probably do not. ‘Can we give them some of the old toys we don’t play with?’<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>So off they went getting their old toys and packing it away - some were not even old, and some the still played with, but they were so happy about sharing their happiness with other children that they were not bothered about giving toys they actually liked. Some of the toys were a bit tacky, so we went to the shop and got some pencils, colouring books etc to add to the pile so they could also have some ‘new’ things.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My kids do not have the latest gadgets, toys etc but they are happy for what we have and they are thankful to Allah for whatever He gives us. They understand that other children may have certain things we do not have, but they are grateful and happy for what we have and Alhumdulillah never have I experienced them throwing a tantrum for something they want or would like to have.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">As a single mother, I must admit money does run low, and sometimes I would like to give them more but we just cannot afford it! But they understand that we have priorities and inshAllah if we have more money then we can have extras from time to time, but they are grateful for whatever I give them and always thanks Allah for it. A ‘jazakhallah khairan’ can go a long way but also the fact as parents if we commit to doing something for them then we actually do it. If we promise to give them something once we are in a better position, then we actually do it!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">To finish off I would like to end with a dua my daughters often make when we finish praying:’Oh Allah thank you for everything you have given us, but can you give my mummy more money or give us a new dad who will buy us all the toys in the world. Ameen’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I do pray both duas get accepted inshaAllah.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-52704750736006982442017-10-18T13:15:00.002-07:002017-10-18T13:15:52.055-07:00A box called Responsibility<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iwNPLsN9E7g/Wee2Y02-XXI/AAAAAAAAAPE/IeeuOGw_ysU9XCdWFDIp7ttLITEg04eHwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_9033.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iwNPLsN9E7g/Wee2Y02-XXI/AAAAAAAAAPE/IeeuOGw_ysU9XCdWFDIp7ttLITEg04eHwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_9033.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One of my friends texted me today to say ‘it’s good to see you posting about women positive thinking again rather than the men bashing posts you have been writing lately.’ I am not a feminist nor do I hate men, I just don’t like incompetent men, men that cheat, men that lies, men that pretend and fake, men who are indecisive, men who are racists, men who are control freaks and men who don’t take on responsibility. So, to be honest, I don’t think it’s such an exhaustive list of men I hate, just maybe there’s more men in the world with those characteristics nowadays than there ever was before.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Anyway, I thought this is a good opportunity for me to post about the men I actually like and appreciate. Unfortunately, not many men will fall in this category as far as I am concerned. One of my work colleagues recently made a remark about women being ‘too much’ nowadays and my response was; maybe it’s not that women are too much, just that we have high standards and guys don’t meet them in general - here we go, I am men bashing again!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I think there is distinctive difference between what is a man and what is a boy. There seems to be more boys around than men - or maybe I just don’t come across men that often, I can literally count on my fingers the number of ‘men’ I have come across in the past 10 years, and literally I think Muslim men are a drop in that handful.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So here we go, thank you to those few men out there who are actually being men and doing what they are supposed to do, and following the example of the prophet Muhammad ( peace be upon him)- the best of men.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My daughters are of the age now where they understand our family is different from most traditional muslim families - where you have a mother and a father. They do not mind it as such - single parenthood is quite a common thing in Europe, maybe not so much in the muslim community but they come it across at school etc. Nowadays, there are many more single muslim mums - not due to being widows (which was more common at the time of the prophet) but more so because of a higher divorce rate.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So, they ask questions about my marriage, whether they have a father or not etc. I have never lied to them - so they are aware their biological father is alive- although according to them, he lives ‘abroad’-something they came up with- and if that makes them happy- then so be it. People are easy to pass judgements, my kids are mixed-raced and their surname definitely give in that they are mixed. Not a lot of Muslims kids carry an English surname.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There are so many assumptions among Muslims, like for example if you are married to someone from a different race- it has to be a ‘love’ marriage; or if your spouse has a non-muslim name- then he/she converted to Islam out of love for you. Maybe in some Muslim ‘cultures; this is the norm - but to assume that this is the case for every single Muslim is choosing to be ignorant and judgemental - not all born muslim are cultural - some actually practice the religion, not the culture.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Moving on, the story I told my daughter is called ‘A box called Responsibility’. I made up this story so they can understand better and be grateful for what they have. The story goes, when babies are born, along comes a gigantic box called Responsibility. This box is the heaviest box anyone ever gets to lift - and only the strongest of people can actually do that. In a lot of families, two people need to lift this box and carry it cos it is SO heavy, and Allah knows one of them is not strong enough to do it by oneself, so he asks BOTH to carry it.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">But, in our family, Mummy is super duper strong, so Allah said ‘Mummy you can do it all by yourself, you don’t need dad’s help.’ So Mummy bent down and lifted the box, and she knew she could carry it all by herself. The box was heavy, but it was a lot of fun, and Mummy didn’t have to share any of things inside with anyone - she felt privilege that Allah chose her to have all the goodies in the box to herself. Some days though, this box does get heavier than usual, Allah puts more goodies in it, then Mummy feels tired and her back starts hurting - those are the days she needs help lifting the box. So then, Allah sends other people to help her carry the box; those are the nice people Allah puts on Mummy’s path and her children’s path - the people who just want to come and help just cos they are nice!</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">And sometimes, just because they (my kids) are so strong themselves, they give me a hand to carry the box. Kids from a single parent household tend to learn about responsibilities much earlier than other kids; the single parent depend on them as much as they depend on him/her.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Those friends, relatives, strangers who help us carry the box are our lifelines. Most single mums rely on their support network - they say it takes a village to raise a child and indeed it does - no matter how small that village is. Single mums tend to support each other, as we know of the struggle and the battles; but what is more amazing are those people who have not experienced our struggle, and yet they care enough to give us a helping hand and a shoulder. Those few people who recognise us, and see our struggle make a real difference to us - that stranger who stops in the shop to distract our children when they are having a meltdown, that friend who call to ask us how we are doing and if we need anything, the men who choose to play daddy in their lives - all of those people contribute in supporting us and we do not acknowledge them enough maybe verbally, but deep down you have no idea how grateful we are to those people. We do not want pity- we do not want those sorry looks - all we want is people to actually put into action what they are saying- actions speak louder than words and your actions tells us about your intentions.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So to those men, who comes in the form of our father/brother/cousin/friend or even stranger a big thank you for re-storing our hope in manhood. I am lucky enough that my brother chose to play that role in my family - although he has his own family, he still helps me with the school runs, with babysitting duties and so on. I could not have done it without him - when I gave up and didn’t believe in me, he pushed me to stand on my own feet - when I need a break, he takes time off work to look after my kids - and whenever he mentions having 4 kids, rather than 2- somewhere I feel even if something was to happen to me, he’d be there for them. My kids chose to call him ‘daddy’ and people have frown upon this as he is their uncle and it could confuse them- they are not confused - they are just giving him the respect and love he deserves.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">A real man knows when to stand up and when to sit down; a real man knows how to take responsibility on (whether it’s his or not); a real man doesn’t just do the talk, but he also does the walk; a real man does not live in a fantasy world but faces reality ( no matter how ugly it is); a real man will know where his priorities lie; a real man will guide and support and finally he will give and command respect. So cheers to all the real men out there - keep up with it - we need you!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">And for those Muslims out there who are scared of us single mums for whatever reasons - the prophet (peace be upon him) was raised by a single mother until she passed away, his first wife Khadija bint Khuwaylid was also a single mother and business woman, Maryam bint Imran was a single mother, Sawdah bint Zam’a ( the prophet’s 2nd wife) was a single mother who was old, Umm Salamah (another wife of the prophet) also a single mum and barren, Zaynab bin Jahsh a divorcee ( wife of the prophet), Ramla bint Abu Sufyan (wife of the prophet and a single mum) and Safiya bin Huyay (wife of the prophet belonging to a Jewish family).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>We single mums and divorcees have so many examples to look up to and we should know our worth according to what the prophet has set and not what society wants us to think. Ladies let’s try to please Allah and his messenger (peace be upon him)!</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-77789496847492444742017-10-15T13:18:00.003-07:002017-10-15T13:18:35.879-07:00Happily ever after is in the Hereafter <div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I was reading a post earlier and it said “Happily ever after is only in the Hereafter” and this made me smile. We are always running after this ‘Happily ever after’ in this world - the dream job, the dream house, the dream marriage/partner, the perfect kids, the perfect education, the perfect look etc etc. So many times, we feel we have failed cos we are nowhere near the targets we’ve set. We still have a long way to go or maybe we have given up on the idea of ever even getting there.</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cTF3N-CqrRk/WePCi1sCjnI/AAAAAAAAAO0/WB8fLZBj_FgNfhJMF_tCf5sfT69fjhcewCLcBGAs/s1600/happily.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="667" data-original-width="500" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cTF3N-CqrRk/WePCi1sCjnI/AAAAAAAAAO0/WB8fLZBj_FgNfhJMF_tCf5sfT69fjhcewCLcBGAs/s320/happily.jpg" width="239" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I personally had to change a lot of things in my life. When I was 18, I set some goals with a friend and we both decided by the time we are 29 we would have achieved so many things in life. Sadly, my friend passed away just after his 20th birthday so he didn’t get to fulfil any of his dreams. It was a bit of a wake up call for me then, we plan but Allah is the biggest of planners. The targets we tend to set are more to do with the achievements of this world, the best target we could set is to do with the hereafter.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I must admit, many of things I set out to achieve by the age of 29 has not been fulfilled; some of them I know deep in my heart will most like never become true; though somewhere in me, I have hope that Allah’s plan is much better and bigger than the one I had.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Becoming a mum before the age of 25 was really not part of my plan, but it was part of Allah’s plan and probably the best I have had so far.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>It has taught me so many things about life and about myself. I have been blessed with motherhood, even though maybe I have had to give up on other things; but I wouldn’t change it for anything else in this world.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">When I turned 29, I decided it was time to change those milestones I had set; some were outdated and others were just not practical; maybe the best choice is to leave it all to Allah, for Him to decide what is to come without really planning too much ahead.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">When my dad passed away, me and my siblings decided to talk to my mum and let her know that we will support her if she ever decides to get married again. Loneliness can be something quite hard to deal with, especially if you have spent most of your life by someone’s side. I clearly remember my mum’s answer: “ No matter how hard it gets here in this world on my own, I at least have the hope that in the hereafter, I will be with your dad again, as his wife once more.” This for me is one of<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>the “Happily ever after” - to have experienced true love and to be willing to wait for the rest of your life to re-live it. They did not have the perfect marriage, but they had what it took to understand each other and to survive through their 25 years of marriage.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So, I have hope that no matter what I have had, and what I have in this world; what is to come in the Hereafter in every aspect of my life will be much better even if I have to wait for eternity InshaAllah. We are but travellers in this world.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My dear sisters, let’s stop running after the goals we have set here, and focus on the fruits we will reap there InshaAllah.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-34220680553642056412017-10-08T12:42:00.002-07:002017-10-09T00:43:10.832-07:00FREEDOM behind the veil<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8Aw9fm64K2A/Wdp-jwg89eI/AAAAAAAAAOE/qgOk5WuO3Ps9LleaZddPZU4rVHf2rHAzwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_9070.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8Aw9fm64K2A/Wdp-jwg89eI/AAAAAAAAAOE/qgOk5WuO3Ps9LleaZddPZU4rVHf2rHAzwCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_9070.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">All we really want sometimes is to be truly free. Our daily struggles make it almost impossible to reach this freedom until we reach breaking point and we have to put everything in perspective. What if real freedom is actually separating us from all the life goals,all those milestones we have been setting ourselves to meet the standard of success set by society?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">For years I have been busy trying to put the broken pieces back-<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>what if the pieces are not meant to be put together agin? What if, it was meant to be broken in the first place so that it can be a unique and beautiful piece of work? I told one of my friend once that I’m broken, and her answer was you are a beautiful kind of broken cos you are expensive and no one can really afford you. Bearing in mind that at that time, my friend was having her own crisis and feeling ‘broken’ herself- it hit home at that time- not that what she said meant much- but the simple fact she had something to say to make me want to feel better about myself.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Today’s blog is mainly a thank you, first and foremost to God - the Creator and the Healer and then to all those people who have contributed in a way or the other to shape me - the people who’ve left good memories and those who have also hurt me at times. When we are at a point in life where we feel low, everything else feels negative - but when we manage to drag yourself out of this self-pity mode and look at things - even the negative people in our life has brought about some positivity.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Society has set certain standards and certain rules, culture has also set additional norms to follow and sometimes our value system does not agree with those rules and norms but we want to fit in badly - we feel the need to belong as humans and we try to adhere to those rules and norms set. Then we start living a lie - a life to please others: our parents, our family, our friends, the community and so on- we try to mould ourselves into their mould, but we forget we were not made for these moulds, so failure was guaranteed from the beginning.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We live in a world where everything is materialistic, where relationships have become a business deal - whereby people won’t help you<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>unless you give something in return; where friendship,love and all relationships have become business dealings of give and take and once you have nothing to give - you are sent to the scrapyard. This can be hard for givers - who were born to give automatically, who were raised to not expect anything in return when they give. As a giver, you are constantly intentionally or unintentionally putting yourself in positions where people will take, to the point where you are drained of giving and you have given too much of yourself- where you are exhausted from putting others’ needs above yours.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">A message for givers: you have needs too and you also need to learn to take and find other givers who will give you back and not just take from you. Your kindness is what makes you extraordinary, but your kindness is also what makes you vulnerable. Some people are born takers: everything is a business deal and is about making profit - and if you are not careful, you will end up losing more than you intended to give. Do not let anyone have this power over you without them intending to give you something else in return. It is a selfish world out there and you got to look out for yourself! Learn to say No! Learn to say Enough!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">In the process of giving, I’ve lost myself more than once - but i’m glad i’ve learnt to step back and to say No! Enough! For years, I’ve been trying to find myself again - but I was looking in the wrong place all along - I was looking to find myself in a society/community I didn’t belong to. But today, I’ve found myself - and I know I do not belong and never will - my values are too different, my beliefs do not fit in and I certainly would be more unhappy trying to fit than live by what I believe in.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">When I was at uni, we had this cartoon picture where friends would tag each other according to the type of characteristics/personality<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>traits<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>others thought was closer to them. I remember being tagged as ‘the one who takes no crap’. At that time, I remember laughing about it but never really pondering why everyone agreed to it. But today it makes perfect sense: I was the type of person who would tell you things the way they were whether it offends you or not and I just didn’t let anyone walk over me. I was actually proud of that me- because I stood for what I believed in and what I believed to be right rather than what would be acceptable according to society’s standards. I set the rules back then- I was the Alpha- the pack leader - the one nobody dared to mess with.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">But then, life happened and I broke. My ex-husband was warned about me - I warned him myself and people around me warned him - I was too strong for my own good - I was not one to break easily and to put up with nonsense. Maybe, he took it as a challenge and had to prove everyone else wrong. God knows best, but you cannot completely break what God is protecting. Today, I thank God for the bad experience - it has made me even stronger and firmer in my belief. Every experience good or bad counts and make us who we are today, and I wouldn’t be where I am without the bad experience. Some people come into our life to stay, others to teach us a lesson and move on. So, I would like to thank him too for the lesson - my experience of him has taught me a lot and has definitely make me believe that God believed I was stronger than I thought.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Some years back, I used to wear the face veil - something I took on because I wanted to. My family was not keen on the idea though they did not contest it. They believed I was going through some form of extremism in the religion- and truth be told even I started to think maybe I was lately. Wearing the face veil though was not for me to show my piety but it was something I did in my personal journey, something I did to please God as an extra act of worship. Then I found myself alone - raising my daughters; I felt the pressure of finding a job to provide for my family, the pressure of being a single Muslim woman out and about in the street with 2 kids in a non-muslim country and I gave in. I found all the excuses to take it off - to make my life easier.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Today, I realise this was where things started to go downhill. It is just a piece of garment that doesn’t mean much maybe - but it was my decision- it was my faith that I jeopardised it. From then, all the other pieces of clothing became a formality - something that was accepted in the society I was trying to conform to, but it was a lie- a lie I was living as it didn’t represent me - I was not identifying the way I wanted to. I grew tired of 'practsing' Muslims who were completely hollow from inside and wanted and still want to separate myself from them - those cultural muslims who pray 5 times a day, dress like a muslim but who's character did not conform to the teaching of Islam.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">For the past few weeks, I asked God to free me rather than to give me something I wanted - I wanted to feel free again and that’s the prayer I made. I attended my Sunday class in the mosque and prayed there and one more time asked God to free me when I come out of the mosque. This time, I felt a relief, I could not wait to be out of the mosque and I went home and as I got home- I texted 2 friends and said I feel like putting my face veil on. One asked me why and the other told me to do it if that’s what I feel like. So I went upstairs and rummaged through my box of clothes and found my face veil and gloves. Just as I was putting them on, my daughters walk in and they both said “Mummy, you look so beautiful like this. I like you like this.”<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Part of the reason I had given to myself before to take it off was about their safety - what if I get attacked while they are with me? But their little sentences struck home, so I looked up in the mirror and I recognised the person I was looking at - it was someone I have seen before and someone I was proud to be. It was then that I realised this is who I was looking for all along. It was God who protected me all along , not men.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So, I took them to the park with their scooters, we ran like crazy - had a race which I lost, but we haven’t had that much fun together in a while - they didn’t care I looked different - they valued me for being who I was - their mum. But, I felt FREE from everything that tied me down before.</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5Myir7LNeAY/Wdp-3ZsiiQI/AAAAAAAAAOI/aFe4gvHPJaAtdBnhVodDmmeKHPFmNi5hgCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_9037.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5Myir7LNeAY/Wdp-3ZsiiQI/AAAAAAAAAOI/aFe4gvHPJaAtdBnhVodDmmeKHPFmNi5hgCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_9037.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So thank you, to you Miss I - my partner in crime for always supporting me; my family for your support and positive criticism, Yezarck- for being my role model and the big sister I always need and all my friends.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">But I will also like to thank those people who intentionally or unintentionally have brought me hurt and pain along the way - cos without you, I would still be struggling to find myself, FREEDOM and PEACE. You as much or maybe even more than others contributed in making me stronger and helping me recognise my true identity. Some people are not meant to stay with us for the rest of the journey but they come into our life to teach us a lesson.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">May God bless all of you!</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-10291843011925207292017-10-01T03:44:00.000-07:002017-10-01T03:44:23.934-07:00Time to refresh, re-evaluate and re-construct Single Muslim Mums!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WhH9qq7ELWA/WdDG4mcfLXI/AAAAAAAAAMI/ywQ4PDdxugwrMa7bBR9Tvr79OIC7ycOYwCLcBGAs/s1600/allah.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="640" height="180" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WhH9qq7ELWA/WdDG4mcfLXI/AAAAAAAAAMI/ywQ4PDdxugwrMa7bBR9Tvr79OIC7ycOYwCLcBGAs/s320/allah.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
My blogs address a lot of the issues face by single muslims mums- as I am one. I have let this become my only identity- someone who is constantly thriving, constantly battling to survive . It has been a long, exhausting and lonely journey and it still is.<br />
<br />
Most people don't choose single parenthood- it chooses us. The reason being is we are the chosen ones because God believes we can pull this up. We are strong enough for it, and as he promised <span style="background-color: white;">"<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: "Source Sans Pro", sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear…” (Qur’an, 2:286).</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">I've hit rock bottom so many times now that I've lost count, but what brings me back every time is my faith. I've had a long struggle with my imaan for about 10 years now. I threw myself in the deep end 10 years ago- raising the bar really high for what I consider make myself the best Muslim. This by far has been the greatest test of my life. I've lost perspective on what my aim is so many times. I am here to worship my Lord, and the rest is just experiences on the way. I mean obviously we need to have a career, a family life, friends etc but that's not our purpose- our purpose is not to please people or even to seek happiness in this world but rather in the hereafter. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">I blog to let other single Muslim Mums out there to know we are all going through the same thing- yes we have to deal with the stigma of being divorced, single mums, of being a particular skin colour, of suffering from certain conditions which most people don't understand. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Lately I have been a lot on survival mode- I was basically living because I have kids under my care- and I couldn't possibly abandon them. I lost interest in everything else- I forgot being myself. As a single mum who is not co-parenting it's hard to put yourself first. It's hard to find the time for you- when you are always busy providing and caring for others. The only me time us mums possibly have is when the kids are in bed. This doesn't even count so much as me time- as you are still stuck and limited in what you can do- you cannot step out, you cannot really enjoy a banter with an adult if you live by yourself. So, you try to find other things to do: like watching a film, reading a book , work out etc- but it get to the point where you are frustrated of the same routine day in and out- there's a void that's not being filled. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">I find that I struggle mostly when I forget to be who I used to be before being 'mum' and maybe the problem lays in me being so different from the old me. I am living a life contrary to my personality- from an extrovert- i've become an introvert, I used to have a lots of friends, now I can count all of them on the fingers of my right hand. I've learnt over the years to choose my friends carefully and not everyone is worthy of your trust - something I knew form a long time ago, but something that never bothered me much back in the days. I've learnt to bite my words and to adhere to social conventions, whereas the old me was outspoken and didn't mince my words. I've learnt people get offended easily when you speak the truth, I've learnt that nowadays you are in people's life only as long as you are useful to them. All those things re not really problem in themselves as this is how the world functions- the problem is when you believe in a different concept about what the world should be and you have the conviction that it should be something completely different and you struggle with the fact that you can't change it. You focus on bringing about the change in others- knowing full well that such a a change will never happen. Then anger builds in, and cos it's all been bottled down deep inside and you've not been able to convey your feelings- you start to suffocate under it and in all this you lose a little bit more of yourself.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">I think not long ago I blogged about the fact that growing up, my dad used to say to me if someone shows you an apple and he believes it's an orange - there is no way in the world you will change his mind. I completely agree with the statement, but somewhere deep in me, I have to fight this injustice- It is just not right. I tried to ignore such things- just g with the flow- live according to the norms of society but it is just not me!</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">So then I sink into depression, cos I'm battling who I am with what I am expected to be. I had this thing about doing what's right since a very young age. I remember in primary school- some kids refused to play with certain kids cos their social status etc- even at a young age I made it a point to play with them at break times and to sit at their table when it was end of year party. I decided to ignore those other children who thought they were better than others. You can call it pride or ego if you like- but for me it was doing what's right.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">As a single mum, we live by a lot of principles because we've seen people disrespecting our rights over and over again - and after becoming a single mum - I feel even more strongly about doing the right thing and to fight for the inequalities. When I give up on this, and just abide by the fake rules created by society- a piece of me die every time and so does my faith.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">I have to keep reminding myself, it's not the religion- but the people. Do not judge a Islam by the actions of Muslims or else I would lose my beliefs. I have so many times given on different things that I upheld when my imaan is at its best, but when it's at its low- then I struggle and give in to worldly pleasure- such a listening to music rather than the Quran. And being fully aware - music is the disease of the heart. Music deal with emotions, and how we are feeling rather than what is the solution- the Qur'an on the other hand offers the solution "Which of the favours of your Lord will you deny? " ( Surah Al Rahman). This is one of my favorite surahs among many others. So now I blast it off- set new goals on where I want to be religiously. I was never too strict- the society was too lenient. When I'm pleasing my lord and I know all my actions are pleasing them- then in that I find happiness. I need to stop running after worldly things and keep preparing for the hereafter- let go of all the distraction and entertainment and fill my heart and my soul with that which will please my Lord.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">So for all of you single muslim mums who are battling depression day in and out - cut everything else out- including your children- make Allah your only focus point and 'with every difficulty will come ease" (94:6). You do not need to become lenient towards your deen to please a society thats not aiming to please their Lord. I know this may sound weird because I've done it myself- kept to the strict minimum and think that's enough- but if you believe there is more to the religion then give it your all and put in practise all that is right- whether you earn a few friends on the way or lose some- but you will always have God by your side.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">"</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #6a6a6a; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; font-weight: bold;">Allah is sufficient for us</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"> and He is the Best Guardian". (</span><wbr style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: small;"></wbr><span style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Quran, Surah Al-Imraan)</span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Our rewards is and shall be with Allah alone.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Keep rocking and rolling my dear single muslim mums- lets aim for the hereafter together and quit trying to please others.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Umm Safia</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #2c3e50; font-family: Source Sans Pro, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: #dcfafa; color: #2c3e50; font-family: "Source Sans Pro", sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br /></span>
<br />Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-51979211019378086012017-07-27T06:17:00.002-07:002017-07-27T06:17:29.933-07:00Extract from The Mum's Diary<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b>This is a short story I've written which is part of a bigger story. All characters are fictitious but might bare resemblance with some people.</b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JK3TSUcJxdc/WXnnxAuFw6I/AAAAAAAAALg/ZhBOcwo6a4cey-IN2Ce1GDAP_jDr5oH_wCLcBGAs/s1600/quote.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="627" data-original-width="800" height="250" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JK3TSUcJxdc/WXnnxAuFw6I/AAAAAAAAALg/ZhBOcwo6a4cey-IN2Ce1GDAP_jDr5oH_wCLcBGAs/s320/quote.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Day 1</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">It’s 1 a.m. The kids have been asleep for a long time now. I should be too. I’ve been trying. I told myself it’s time to go to bed too but it’s been more than 2 hours since. The house is quiet as usual. It is the time of the day/night that I used to enjoy; the few hours where there’s no shouting, no fighting, no rush, no homework, no chores, the house is clean and quiet and when I could enjoy the sweet silence.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The same silence now that I dread; I wish it wasn’t night, I wish they didn’t have to go to sleep, I want to hear the shouts, the fights, the arguments. The silence is starting get eerie, it’s the sort of loud silence that you can hear even when there’s nothing to hear.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I try to read a book, get past the first few lines and decided it wasn’t doing any good; I don’t care about whether the character wants to move somewhere else because the grass is greener. She’ll eventually figure out it’s not as green as she thought, then reality will hit her and throw her down once again, and she will have to start all over again and it won’t be heading anywhere as usual and if it does, it’s all fantasy as in real life nothing as such happens.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Anyway, the book was a bad idea to start with; so I move on to look for a good film to watch, nothing is good enough - there’s not a good horror, not a good thriller, I don’t like fantasy, the romcoms make me sick, the chickflicks are fake, just absolutely nothing interesting. Maybe I should go back to watching ‘Women who kill’ I thought, I used to enjoy that. So, instead I try to find a film that I used to enjoy before, put it on, but I already know all the scenes and even though I watched this a million times before and loved it, now it seems boring and I fast forward most of it.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So far, it’s only 2 a.m. Nothing much has changed. So I get up and decide to pray a bit more, maybe God will listen to my prayers and bring some meaning to life. So I pray, and pray and pray. It’s only 3 a.m now. I’m tired of praying. I’m not sure if it’s just a physical tiredness or there’s more to it. But who cares!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I crawl back into my bed, the same bad I’ve been spending days and nights on that badly needs to be sorted, the bedding needs to be changed , there are creases all over, but I don’t care anymore; that just means additional work: more washing, more tidying up, more getting stress over why this side of the bedsheet is not being tucked properly and why it’s longer than the other side. I don’t want to do it, I refuse to contemplate about beddings and bedsheets.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">It’s 4 a.m. now. I hear a muffled noise, it’s my own. How long have I been sniffling? I have no idea - time and day doesn’t matter anymore. We are passed that stage. Actually I don’t even remember what day it is anymore. I’ve started to wear my watch 24/7 so I do not lose the notion of time as well. I forgot too many times in the past few days what day and time it was - I was doing the wrong thing at the wrong time; I forgot it was time to pick up for school, I forgot it was swimming day for the kids, I forgot I had an appointment - forgetting seems to be the new black! I want to remember the little things that needs doing, not the things I have been trying to forget. But the old memories are like a stubborn old man, they are not ready to leave to make place for the new ones. It’s like, they made it a point to block any new ones from entering their territory - they rule and they will carry on ruling.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So now it’s actually 5 a.m, a ray of hope - the day is about to start. I’ll be so busy that it wouldn’t matter anymore. I won’t have any time to ponder over my uselessness. Just another 1.5 hours, and the kids should be up and there should be enough noise and mess in the house; which I will hate but which I will also love. It’s like having a bitter-sweet relationship. I hate the mess, I hate the noise, but maybe that’s what keeps me sane and give my sleepy and inactive brain something useful to do.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Tick Tock Tick Tock. Just waiting for the little voices now - anytime it will be there!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Finally, they are awake, I can hear them talking about coming into my room and discussing if it’s a good idea or not. They have to tread carefully at the moment, they have been walking on glass - any wrong movement from their side and they can end up in trouble even when they didn’t call for it.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">A little knock on the door, ‘Can we come in?’ asked a little voice.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I have been waiting for this. ‘Yes’, I said but there was still no enthusiasm in my voice. Maybe I should fake it, and show them that I do want them around.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Kisses and cuddles, just what I needed and the little ‘I love yous’. There’s something magical about a child telling you they love you - because you know that they are the only people who really mean it. Kids are not scared to show their emotions, and being able to experience a child’s love is an amazing blessing that I should be thankful for. But I’m not.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>I’m just an ungrateful being who can only see the negatives in everything.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So they hop into the bed and start to fight about wanting me to be right by their side or which side of the bed I should be facing. Now, I’ve had enough. I don’t even want them in the room anymore. It’s getting too loud and I’m missing the silence of the night. So I shoo them off to their room telling them I’ve had enough of them arguing over everything and to leave me alone!<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Alone! - a word that means nothing yet everything.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The morning has started, so I will keep busy, there’s breakfast time, washing, getting ready etc. There’s no time to waste. We have to get there on time. We need to rush through everything even though we are actually early. I’m just looking for a reason to shout at them now. Why are your shoes still not on? Where’s your hair clip? Any excuse is good for me to have a go at them at this point.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘I’ve told you to get your school bag, didn’t I?’ I shouted</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘But you never took it out of the car!’ the older child says.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Indeed I haven’t. When was the last time I actually did some work with her or listen to her reading books? I couldn’t remember - all I know is it’s been a while. What do I even do when I’m home?<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I’ve told her to read a book to her younger sibling everyday and she does - so I don’t even need to keep an eye on her reading. All I have to do is make sure the are fed, they quite like cereals anyway so that does the job some days. But I’ve been trying lately to cook different dishes, to re-invent myself - maybe If I make good enough food, it will turn into some sort of hobby and skill. But other days, I can’t be bothered to even get the cereal box out.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So I drop them off to school. The rest of the day is easy, being spent between doing some actual work and staring at the ceiling. Maybe I should do something interesting, like go running - but it’s raining as usual. How about making new furniture with the pallets - this is something I enjoyed before, not a really good idea since it’s raining outside and working inside means more mess and more cleaning.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">It’s almost pick up from school time, but I forgot cos I was too busy staring at an empty ceiling, so now i’m running late. But I end up there just a few minutes later.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So we set off for home.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Where are you going?’ asks the children.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Home, where else?’ I replied.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘But it’s Wednesday today.’ says the older one.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Damn it! I forgot again!’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So a quick U-turn, one of many nowadays and back to where I should be heading.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Finally home and dinner time. I dish the food - I sit down and eat with them, they are busy telling the things that they did today and I have no idea what they are talking about- it seems like they are so far away , all I can see is their mouths moving but no sound coming out.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Is that right mummy?’ the little one asks.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘What is right?’ I ask.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So she starts all over again, and I still can’t hear it. I’m gone now, I’m very far in my mind.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Is it right?’ she asks again. ‘Mummy!’ now she is getting annoyed.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Yes, it’s right,’ I say. I don’t really care, it probably is wrong but who cares what’s right or wrong. They’ll figure out as they grow up. I am not always right and I don’t know everything so whatever answer I give yes or no it wouldn’t make a difference to them.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘You said we can have ice-cream today.’ says the older one.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Did I?’ I try to remember but it’s pointless, I can’t remember most conversation nowadays cos I’m not even participating in them.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Anyway, they can have ice-cream if that makes them happy and they don’t expect anything else from me.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Can we watch something?’ they ask.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Of course they can, that’s what they have been doing every day now - wasting their time watching useless stuff cos I can’t be arsed to acknowledge their presence, I might as well buy a TV and a tablet like all those parent who use them as babysitters!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So they watch until it’s bed time. But I want to do something different today, so I choose a film we can all watch together - I’ve been told it’s a good film. It’s about this little girl that is super intelligent and is being raised by her uncle after her mum passed away. Something which according my twisted mind is suitable for little kids to watch. But I forgot how sensitive my eldest is, she’ll cry at anything even a cartoon - so there she was in tears when the girl gets taken away and put in a foster family. So I cry along with her - not sure what i’m crying for. Maybe I’m sad for my child, maybe I’m sad for the little girl in the film, maybe i’m sad for the uncle for losing his ‘daughter’, maybe I’m sad because I just happened to be a sad person. I’m not sure but it felt good to hug her and cry.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So it gets to bed time again and the eerie silent night starts all over again.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Day 2<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Repeat of Day 1</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Days 3<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Repeat of Day 1</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">And so on</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The end.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-80045970089400503282017-07-22T11:47:00.002-07:002017-07-22T11:47:47.068-07:00Single mums battling stress and depression<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I have never met any single mum who hasn’t had to battle with depression at one point or another in life. It’s a free gift that comes along with single parenthood. This is not my story but the story of single parents in general and of a lot of other categories of people.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8URSFvtC8v8/WXOdseVDPnI/AAAAAAAAAK8/JkQMHzpQTfoTPp2VERq6wdQ_LgoGZydigCLcBGAs/s1600/wpid-single-mother-quote.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="275" data-original-width="500" height="176" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8URSFvtC8v8/WXOdseVDPnI/AAAAAAAAAK8/JkQMHzpQTfoTPp2VERq6wdQ_LgoGZydigCLcBGAs/s320/wpid-single-mother-quote.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">As single parents, we have become accustomed to solely rely on ourselves, partly due to having been let down and partly due to pride. It’s having this constant pressure to prove to ourselves rather than others that we do not need anyone and we are more than capable to do everything by ourselves; that we have everything under control and all is well.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Let’s be honest, nobody has all their shit together, we try our best, but we are bound to fail at times or the other. We know it, and we understand it. We know we have good days and bad days like other people, but sometimes the bad can be overwhelming, it can makes us feel like we are failing in every aspect of life. We know in reality it’s not true. We know that we are not complete failures but unfortunately we have set high standards for ourselves, standard which when we fail to meet at times can feel like having devastating effects on ourselves ad those around us, in particular the people we love and care about the most, mainly our children.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Everyone deal with problems differently, some withdraw as a mean to find strength within, some are able to ask for help and find support in others. We are all different, and our reaction to stress tends to be different depending on our personality and experience. Dealing with stress is not the main issue, it’s when this stress take over your life, in particular your family life.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">From observing and discussing with single mums, I realised<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>a lot of suffer find comfort to suffer in silence as we are not used to asking for help or relying on others; when we find ourselves in a place where support is offered, we start to have doubts whether it’s genuine, it’s a show or it’s pity.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One thing we really have a hard time to accept is the fact that often we are made to feel consciously or unconsciously as this pitiful creature, with a ‘horrific’ past that needs to be saved and supported because life has been too hard on us. We are not looking for pity and the last thing you can offer us is this ‘I feel so sorry for you’. We do not need that, we’ve made it without you feeling sorry for us, we would rather you just offer us your companionship than support; we are more than capable of supporting ourselves and we have done a good job so far without your pity. Sometimes, all we need is knowing we can talk to you about anything, without you throwing your sympathy in our face.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We are the role models for our children, and when things start to go haywire, our first reaction is how are the kids processing it. For example, when we are dealing with stress or depression, we might have the best of everything in life, yet it feels like we have achieved nothing-<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>our children may be doing everything in the world that makes us prude of them, and we genuinely are but somewhere in our mind, we have a battle going on about the other things we are not able to give them; those little pleasures they are seeking, when are unable to provide it make us feel like failures.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One of my friends kids have recently started asking a lot of questions about their absent father. This can be quite stressful if you do not hold the answers to certain question, especially as she explained that her children were now trying to find father figures in other people; linking her to men they think will make their family complete, and even asking people to marry their mum. As a single mum myself, I can understand how frustrating that is, it adds pressure on her to find someone to give her children a ‘normal’ family life - something she knows she cannot do by herself - she would never be able to fit in the shoes of a father no matter how hard she tries. She is bound to fail in this area. Moreover, marrying single mums is another subject in itself- how many men are actually whole-heartedly ready to step up and foot the bill of a ready-made family? Little things like that, which is not in our control can add on to the already ongoing emotional, physical and financial pressure we face on a daily basis.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I wish we could have a support system in place for Muslim single mums, where some of the pressure can be taken off them. Certain things are not always practical, such as going for counselling, it’s additional pressure, who looks after the kids when you go? Or suggestions such as go to the gym, really? when does she get to do that unless she can afford to pay for the creche.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>It’s easy to tell her make me time for yourself, but how is she supposed to do that? Only other single parents understand this and unfortunately the pressure is so high on each of them that at times it becomes difficult to support each other.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I cannot offer any practical advice to any single mum in that position but I’d just like to remind you, you have been there before, many a times and you will be here again many a times - just remember that whatever you are doing, someone else is completely relying on you and you need to be physically and emotionally available and strong for them.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-3549842280975476862017-06-07T11:16:00.000-07:002017-06-07T11:16:19.440-07:00I am a muslim and I am not a racist but I wouldn't marry a black guy!<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Assalamu’alaikum dear readers and fellow bloggers,</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tAT-i2PVsZc/WThCjRCkzwI/AAAAAAAAAKE/sJO703Re-lsnlh3cw0B39JNvSGXg7LnTACLcB/s1600/racist_plasma.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="396" data-original-width="704" height="180" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tAT-i2PVsZc/WThCjRCkzwI/AAAAAAAAAKE/sJO703Re-lsnlh3cw0B39JNvSGXg7LnTACLcB/s320/racist_plasma.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="p1">
<br /></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I had taken a long break from blogging, probably more than year; I got busy with life, work and kids but inshAllah I want to re-start blogging or at least blog from time to time about issues which I think should be discussed.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My topic will touch a number of subjects, in particular, racism in Islam but I will also look at other things, such as single motherhood since this actionmum blogspot!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Firstly, I want to give bit of background about my upbringing which will probably explain why I failed or still cannot get around certain issues I found that majority of muslims prioritise. I was born in a practising family, with very limited cultural input; obviously we dressed according to our tradition, ate our type of food etc, but there was not any mixing of Islam with cultural beliefs or tradition. It has not always been the case for my family, before my birth ; my parents were pretty much cultural muslims, they did things because their parents were doing it without any understanding of why it was required and if it was required at all. Alhumdulillah, they both wanted to learn and Allah guided them. By the time, I came along, I never got to see the traditional/cultural side of them. My parents did not attend family gatherings where certain unislamic things were practised or things which they considered bid’ah (innovation) or where shirk was practised although good ties were maintained with family and friends; so I was pretty much ignorant about cultural muslims.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Growing up, I pretty much had a very simplistic approach to Islam, which was all based on Qur’an and sunnah. Obviously being a teenager and myself, I was not a perfect or an almost perfect practising muslim, and had and still do have my shortcomings which is from my nafs. May Allah reward both my parents for their guidance. Ameen.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I grew up in a multicultural society, we were the only muslim family in our area, and honestly we loved it. I hated the idea of living in a muslim only area. I was lucky enough Alhumdulillah to have friends from all shades and colours, from different nationalities and backgrounds. I even went on to study at a catholic secondary school, as my parents wanted me to be in a school where discipline was at the heart of it, and faith schools are known for being strong on discipline. During my years at secondary school, I mainly had non-muslim friends, and the very few muslims that did attend the school were not much practising or belonged to more cultural families. Till date, I am still in touch with my secondary school friends, muslims and non-muslims and so many have had such a beautiful journey, some of them, their lives have taken a u-turn and it’s amazing to see how they have all become stronger and better in different ways.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My point is, growing up, I never thought I had to choose my friends based on their ethnicity, nationality, religion, sect, caste, social status etc. I had no clue how important this is actually among muslims, please bear in mind I said Muslims and not Islam. My parents never discouraged me in anyway or talked down about people who were ‘different’ to us. For me, if you accept someone, you accept them fully as they are.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I then moved to a European country for further studies. This was my first contact with the muslim world without my parents involvement. When I came to the UK, I knew things were going to be different, I was to live by myself but I was also to make the right choices and uphold the trust my parents have put in me. Again, I was not always on top of everything but I tried my best. The city I chose to live in and study was mainly a ‘white English’ city; so finding common grounds was going to be hard. The university was chosen by many students for it’s wild nightlife. Let’s just say, it was famous across UK for getting drunk and clubbing. I didn’t struggle to make friends,; everyone on my course was ‘white’, my flatmates were all ‘white’ and they were all non-muslim. I just did not have much in common with them. Their favourite hobby was to go clubbing obviously and get pissed. By that time, I had made friends with 2 practising Christians, who were not against the idea of sometimes going out for a meal. So, basically that was my social life.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I then came across, some people who were originally form my country but soon realised, I was better off keeping my distant from most of them, and basically I only got along with 1 Hindu girl and she didn't drink, she didn’t date and we had much more in common than the rest of the people I had met so far.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">After a while, I came to know, there was a uni mosque; so I started going to the mosque to pray and also in the hope of making friends. Never did it cross my mind how hard it was going to be to make muslim friends. My first year at uni was miserable in terms of making muslim friends. I realised that most people tend to hang around with people from their country of origin or belonging to the same ethnicity group as them. I mean people would say hello to you and be friendly with you when they see you, but that was about it, nobody was interested in becoming your friend for real. I almost gave up on making muslim friends then, I had managed to only make 1 muslim guy friend and that was pretty much about it. Now, I know it might be like omg, it was a guy etc. I was a tomboy, so having guy friends was never an issue to me, I pretty much thought of myself as a guy, and I’m sure, my friends who knew me back in the days would certainly agree with this statement.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So, after attempting to break through different ethnic groups at uni, I decided it was not gonna happen.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">My second year at uni, was much better, there was a lot of young girls who joined uni, they were my juniors but they also wanted to practise the deen, so they used to come to the mosque , as we used to call it, the den. Those girls had something similar with me as they did not belong to any group, basically we used to call ourselves, the rejects. We used to laugh about it, but nevertheless, it was also stating an important fact. Some were mixed-raced and thus did not belong to a group, others were asians born and bred in Arab countries, so the didn't have anything in common with the Arabs or asians, some like me, did not have anyone form their country of origin, or their parents country of origin, some were reverts, in a nutshell, we did not belong to a majority group. </span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Uni was basically, my first exposure to racism among muslims and how you can become an outcast in the muslim community.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘You are good enough to be an acquaintance, and I’ll call you my friend but you are not good enough to be part of my circle.’- Moi, I believe that was really the motto.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Following uni, there was talk about marriage and all, and obviously at that point in my life, I was not sure what I was going to do next, it was hard to find a proper job due to recession , I was considering studying further, but i was not completely against the idea of getting married if I met the right person. By that time, I felt so strongly about the whole racism in Islam thing, cos I would interact with people and realised how narrow-minded they were - they had to marry a person from a particular country of origin, of a particular shade, of a particular ethnicity, of a particular caste, of a particular nationality, of a particular sect, of a particular social status, of a particular educational level, of a particular profession etc etc. I realised that people have missed the whole point about marriage; people should be married for 4 reasons, and we agree on that, but there was one reason that topped all the others: that was virtue and deen!</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I remember I was so annoyed, I even started a group about interracial marriage on Facebook to change people’s mentality- I was crazy maybe, but I thought through discussion about the religion and through hadith and Qur’an, I could change people’s mindset. I started to see the stigma attached to non-white reverts ( I am sorry but white reverts, you do have it easier than the rest cos of your skin colour), to people of darker skin colour, to people who were not arabs or asian- yes! I mean black people. There was so much fuss over such petty things, when we were only meant to be striving for akhirah. I remember discussions with friends, and they put it down to personal preference or just pleasing their parents. I still believe it is not personal preference, it’s all this bullshit people have been fed through colonialism and their own belief that the fairer skin is better, or that we have better hair than them etc. I never had any issue with someone’s skin color, educational level, social status, caste, nationality etc; my parents taught me from early on, if someone is good enough to be your friend, then he/she is good enough to be part of your family. I knew my family won’t have any issues if I decided to marry someone ‘different’ as long as that person is a muslim. So I purposely looked for people who were ‘different’, as a single woman ( never been married before) and a virgin, I considered people from all backgrounds: white reverts, black reverts, asian reverts, divorcees, single parents, people form African origin, people from Asian origin etc, born muslims who have committed zina but repented, people with a disability. I did not see why I should look down upon someone who had a past, who has a particular skin color, who has kids; for me the only way they would excelled themselves was in the deen.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I got rejected by many, and I rejected others for reason of compatibility and ended up marrying a white revert. My ex- husband was not as educated as me, he had a past, he didn’t have a high paid job or career,he was younger than me, he didn’t have children (though if he did, it would not have been an issue); but at that time I saw his love for the deen and that was all that mattered. I am not saying that look only for the deen, but that should be our priority. My marriage did fail, for different reasons. But, I have no regrets as such, I did istikhara before I got married and I believe it was Allah’s will, and I had my 2 beautiful children out of it. My point is, my marriage didn't go down the drain because of any of those superficial ideas that people look for when getting married, it was more to do with our personalities.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Now, as a divorcee and a single mother, I still have friends who don't belong. I have made new friends and we still fit in the ‘rejects’ category. This now leads me to understand better the stigma attached to divorcees and single mums. Recently, things have been thrown more in my face. I have been going to the mosque regularly during Ramadan, so met a lot of other people,who would tell me how much they like me etc. And I have had discussions with my friends who are also single mums and divorcees. We had become so frustrated with Muslims; not Islam, but majority of muslims in this country follow their culture rather than the religion. I had been approached by aunties in the mosque to marry their son, until they realised I’m a divorcee with kids, my other friends have also been rejected for the same reason. Being divorcee, already gives you minus point, but being a single mum, double, triple etc your minus point depending on the number children you have. I’ve had people telling me they want to leave an abusive marriage but they are too scared to be on their own with or with our kids. How appalling is that! A person is ready to stay in an abusive relationship for fear of rejection by the ‘Ummah’.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We forget that Bilal, the person with the most beautiful voice, was black, that Khadija (r.a) the first and only wife of the prophet (peace be upon him) until her death was higher in status than the prophet, was more educated, was more than 15 years older than him, was a widow with kids from her previous marriage, that the majority of the wives of the prophet, except for one were all divorcees and single mums and definitely not virgins ( as people seem to confuse chastity with virginity).</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I just want people to reflect deeply. I am a mother of 2 mixed-race daughters, I wonder what the future will hold for my children. They have been raised by a single mum, come from a ‘broken’ family, they do not belong to any community in particular and one is fairer than the other. One day, InshaAllah I hope they find someone who will accept them for who they are. I hope I do not have to explain why certain people are ok with being ‘friends’ with us, but wouldn’t consider them as daughter-in law/ sister-in-law. I hope I don’t have to explain to my darker child, why her sister, being fairer gets more marriage proposals than her. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Recently one of my friend told me she is suffering from a ‘disability’, she had been engaged for a year, when she found out about it. The groom to be and his family called off the wedding as they didn’t want a disabled wife/daughter-in law. My concern is, what would they have done, if she found out about it after the wedding, would they have just dumped her at her parents house? What if the situation was different and the guy was the one with the ‘illness’, would she have done the same? We look down on people because we think we are superior but all comes from Allah. Nobody chooses an illness or when they will fall sick, does that mean we have to consider those people as inferior to us?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Quite recently, I went through a phase where being fed up with the mentality of muslims, I was ready to give up on the religion itself, Alhumdulillah it didn't get that far. I have now decided to restrict my circle to people who accept us for who we are fully and not just as ‘friends’ but as family, who will one day consider to marry their sons to my daughters and will rise above those cultural barriers they have put up or their parents have put up. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There is nothing more annoying than seeing people of knowledge or preaching knowledge, telling you all at the wonderful things about Islam, then realising, this is the same person that would never consider my daughter for her son or her brother because she wouldn’t tick her ridiculous boxes.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I hope that one day, the majority of muslims will release we are all equal in front of Allah, except in one thing and that is our good deeds.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Nobody choses any of the stuff that people give so much importance to, it was all given by Allah, except for our choice to follow the religion properly.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<style type="text/css">
p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000}
p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 11.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 13.0px}
span.s1 {font-kerning: none}
</style>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">If you really think of people who are different from you as friends, then your actions should reflect that, and it should not be something that only comes out of your mouth to temporary please someone or to give you the false illusion that you are not a racist.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1"> Face it you are a racist! No need for sugarcoating.</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-50118807618521884692015-08-26T16:30:00.000-07:002015-08-26T16:30:11.410-07:00Feeling Positive!<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Like I mentioned in my previous blog, I had just come out of a really difficult time which was not related to any particular reasons but just as part of things you come across in life.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One thing I have realised, it really does matter who you hang out with for your mental and emotional well-being. As compassionate human beings, we often take on other people’s problems and make it ours, and by doing so sometime we absorb the negative energy around such problems.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I happened to give a shoulder to people at the time when I should have been given one. The best help, is self-help and thereby I dragged myself further down, sometimes in order to help others you must make sure that you are well in yourself first. It’s not being self-centred but precaution is better than cure. Once you are more positive about life and can release some positive energy to the people around you, it will make things easier for yourself and others; you will see through that thick mist around you , and it will gradually clear.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">We sometimes find it hard to say No, when people call us fro one thing or the other, but we need to know our limitations at time. </span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I have learnt that in order to help others, I need to come to my own help first, if I am not positive and I hang round people who have negative thoughts, it is not going to do me any good or to the people who I need to care and look after more.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Once you overcome that negativity, you will see that whatever looked like a mountain before, doesn’t anymore, you don’t care about the future or what will happen, the worry is gone,and you live every moment as it comes and put your trust in Allah and His wisdom, that there must be something good in what is happening to you.</span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Since overcoming this negativity, I have been able to enjoin a more healthy relationship with my Lord, myself, my family & friends and also those people whose negativity was previously helping me to drown.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">One of my favourite verses in the Qur’an is from Surah Al-Baqarah and I shall end with it:</span></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p3">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<br />
<div class="p4">
<span class="s1">But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not. - </span><span class="s2">Qur’an (2,216)</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-56978871735111098652015-08-16T14:01:00.002-07:002015-08-16T14:34:06.045-07:00Amazing Mums- You are worth it!<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">The German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche once eloquently said: “That which does not kill us, makes us stronger.” </span></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">As a matter of fact this has proven to be so true on many occasion on a personal level and from observing people around me.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I remember as a 15 year old when my Mum came into my room to talk to me privately and break the news that my father has been diagnosed with last stage cancer and the doctors didn’t know how long he had left. I remember the shock I had, but I also remember looking at my Mum, thinking how fragile she looks and how now I have to be the stronger one, and instead of breaking down in tears, I told her have faith, everything will be all right inshallah.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There are many times in life where Allah tests you, and sometimes you yourself you feel like this is your breaking point, this is the last straw and you cannot go further anymore. One day, one of teachers who used to just offer free counselling called me out of the classroom. My Mum had secretly told him that my Dad was dying and she is not quite sure how I was reacting to it and to keep an eye on me. He called me outside and started to talk to me and then stopped in the middle of the conversation and said to me; he was by the way an agnostic, he said: ‘ You are strong and the thing that makes you strong is your faith in God.’ This is something I still remember and reminds myself whenever I am feeling down. I never knew I was religious or even that religion had a major part to play in my life then, yes, I did know I made personal choices based on my religion, but I never actually thought Faith played such a central role in my life, and indeed it does.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Many a times, when there was no doors to knock on, no gates were opened except His, I would turn to Him, my Creator, and tell him about all my sorrow and how despair I feel, and Subhanallah He would always reach out to me. I remember a very special incident, after I left my husband with my then 5 months old daughter and a new bump, I had no money and was down to my last £5 note. My daughter needed milk and I couldn’t breastfeed as she didn’t know how to be breastfed( even though I tried for 4 months), I was about to be thrown out of the house with the baby and bump as I had no money to pay the rent and bill, and couldn’t find a job due to my situation. I was very upset and there was a river behind me house, I remember walking to it and thinking, would it not have been better for my kids If I were dead, at least then somebody might step up and take care of them. Then for some reason after crying my eyes out, I decided to go and sit in the mosque, I was looking to find some peace there. I knelt down and prayed and cried to Allah, not asking anything but just relieving my sorrow, and when I lift my head up, a lady and her little girl were leaving the mosque and there next to my head was £60. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">This was just one incident but such incidents happened many a times in my life, especially during the first 1.5 year after my divorce, as a mother to 2 children under 2, i couldn’t find a job to provide for them, neither was I eligible for any benefits. But , Alhumdulillah the ball kept rolling as He was in charge. On one occasion, after finding out I was pregnant, I told my ex-husband this is going to be hard, we can barely provide for ourselves, he said to me ‘Remember, Allah says he will provide.’ Indeed provide He did. When my kids and I were left fending for ourselves only did He come to our help, when my children’s own father refused to financially support them, only He supported them. My life was a due to Him but more than ever, Allah has reminded me that All comes from Him. He says ‘ after hardship comes ease, but does he not keep testing the ones he loves most to keep us in his remembrance?</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Being a single mother can be stressful, especially as you have to play Mummy and Daddy all the time but on top of that if like ‘daddy’ you have to provide as well then that makes 3 full-time jobs. I remember reading about depression in single parents, and it was suggested that it’s a very common problem single parents face due to the increase in work load and no relaxation time. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">A few months back, I called in to see my GP. I had to take the step, I saw it coming, I felt it but I had no time to sort it out, I was too busy filling in all the different roles. When I walked in, I didn’t know what really I was expecting, I just knew it was time to seek help, not only for my sake but mainly for the sake of my kids. I walked in not knowing what I will exactly say to Him, but as soon as I was in I said to him, ‘I’m exhausted.’ And nothing, complete silence. This is what I needed space and time. I was tired of running and dealing with things, I just didn’t have the energy to do it anymore. Both my children came to my appointment, just like they have to go to everything else I have to attend. He looked at me, it was 6 p.m appointment, he asked , ‘are you a single Mum to 2 toddlers?’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Yes! Somebody finally got it! I am not the superhuman sometimes people make out, I am just human, and I get tired too, and frustrated. Maybe he read on my file about the precious domestic violence issue as well, but I don’t know I felt this person knew what I was talking about. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">He just said, ‘do you want time off work?’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I said, ‘ I can’t afford it, I teach Special Education Needs and challenging behaviours.’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘That adds to it, doesn’t it?’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘Yes.’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">‘It’s normal to feel like that, you are mentally and physically exhausted and your body and mind is not having the time to rest and get some energy back and with your kids being so young and you working and doing it all on your own, it was bound to happen at some point.’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">For the first time, it made sense, it’s normal, a person can’t do that many things at a time, and on top of that trying to be perfect in each and every role, no wonder I was feeling constantly lethargic and I had back pain and all kicking in.’</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">So, once more I was referred to counselling. I am not quite sure how counselling help really, but for me it just gives me the space and time I need for myself. I can finally muster the courage to ask someone to babysit for me for an hour without feeling guilty as it is for medical reasons. </span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">Whenever I had a discussion with single mothers, we all seem to have the same issue, we all need that time and space yet none of us will ask anyone to look after our kids for us to have that. And many a times, this is a direct result of how our responsibilities have been passed on to us. In such a situation, the other parent normally decided to have no or minimal role to play i the children’s lives, leaving the mother to take on board all the responsibilities, as such we understand what it feels like when somebody throw their responsibility onto you and feel guilty when we have to pass on our responsibility to somebody else. We tend to forget its only for a matter of a couple of hours and that doesn’t mean we have failed our children or ourselves if we had to take some time out.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">I have just finished my last counselling sessions, had to cancel my last 2 sessions due to babysitting issues, now is it over? Yes, for the time being, will it come back? Most likely. But the main thing is, I reached out for help, and it came on time, it has re-stored my faith yet again not only in God but in myself.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">There’s nothing shameful about seeking medical attention when you feel you need it, or therapy as I prefer calling it, prevention is better than cure and there’s nothing better than self-help but remember nothing happens without his will. Each time you overcome an obstacle, you realise you come back stronger. Remember the little things He gives you to be grateful for, and remember your achievements.</span></div>
<div class="p2">
<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
<br />
<div class="p1">
<span class="s1">You mothers are amazing and doing an amazing job, often not recognised, whether you are single, divorced, married or widowed, you are all awesome even though many times you don’t feel like it, remember no man can walk in your shoes and many choose to not even attempt, and give credit where it’s due cos you are creditworthy, you are selfless and you are the backbone of those kids you are raising!</span><br />
<span class="s1"><br /></span>
<span class="s1">Please note, this has been written for the August "Grow' theme by Muslimah Bloggers.</span><br />
<span class="s1">http://muslimahbloggers.com/general/august-monthly-prompt-grow/</span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-60629723689621820532015-04-07T16:34:00.005-07:002015-08-16T14:00:16.314-07:00Our busiest week<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We spent the first week of the easter holiday not doing
anything as it was pouring every single day. I did manage to take both of them
swimming one day but as there isn’t many ladies only sessions on, it’s not
amazing when it’s chucking outside and you haven’t got much to do.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Week 2 was better! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Monday the sun was shining brightly, and as I looked outside
at noon, I knew it was just the perfect weather to be outdoors. I am quite an
impulsive person, so I decided to take the girls to the beach, which was
approximately 2 hours drive from where we live. I called my brother to see if
he wants to come, but his little girl wasn’t well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The clock was ticking away and already half
the day was gone, it will be 2 by the time I get there, which is not bad, but
then again maybe I could go earlier and spend the whole day there. I decided
then to go to The Butterfly House, which was only an hour away and not really
that expensive for us 3. I didn’t mind taking them on my own, but for some
reason I thought it’d be nice for us to have some company. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I rang a friend, who is also a single Mum
with 2 kids about the same age as mine. Like me, she is used to doing things on
her own, so it would be nice for us to do it together if she’s free. I knew it
wasn’t probably going to work out as I was only giving her half an hour notice.
But she was p for it!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
All 6 of us had an excellent day there, our kids enjoyed
each other’s company, and we enjoyed having another adult to talk too on the
trip, it was only an hour away from the city, so it was a nice journey for us
to spend half the day. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I checked the weather forecast for the week and it said
sunny all week, I wanted the kids and myself to enjoy a nice break, so I
decided we will do something special everyday!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tuesday: <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I woke up
and looked outside, another sunny day. What shall we do today? I thought. I
wasn’t in the mood to drive far, so something local would be nice. 9.15 a.m., I
was still undecided. I called another friend to see if she’s free so we could
taker my girls and hers to the cinema as the tickets were only £1.50 for the
junior movies, but we had to be there for 10.00 a.m. Her daughter was still
asleep. 2 mins later, she rang to say she’s up and she wants to go. So we
rushed to get ready and at exactly 9.45, I pre-booked our tickets so we wouldn’t
have to pay an extra 25p on the door per person. It was their first experience,
and if you have been reading my blogs, you would know y now, we do not have a
TV and my kids are not much used to watching films and other programmes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was risky, but I thought I won’t know
until I try it out. My eldest is best mate with my friend’s daughter, so I knew
she would most likely be alright, and she can sit still for sometime if she’s
watching something. My youngest has a sitting still span of less than 5 mins
when she’s watching anything, even kids programmes, she’s just not interested!
I knew she was the main challenge, and she proved me right! She thought it was
ok to talk loudly there, to shout if she felt like it, to sing random made up
songs randomly or even to walk and up the row for no particular reason and
finally to have continuous trips to the toilet! Well, my eldest did manage to
sit still for about 90% of the film, which I must say is an achievement! Will I
do it again? Most likely! Them being out of the house, means that my house is
not going to be messy and dirty, and I don’t have to worry about them messing
about with my things and we are all safe and happy ( to a certain degree).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh and we did spend the rest of the day at the park.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wednesday: I got those cheap farm tickets on Groupon a while
back, I did buy a big package as I intended for my brother and his kids to join
us if they wish to. I had discussed it with him and since the voucher doesn’t
expire until end of June, we were not going there unless the weather is on our
side, and luckily it was this week!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Thursday: At the beginning of the week, I had a friend
texting to ask how I am doing and stuff. We haven’t spoken in a long time. So we
were just talking about how we find things boring and there’s nothing to do.
So, I asked her if she wants to go bowling, as I know this place (through work)
that does cheap deals. And she said she was in. Then she asked another of her
friend to join in, but it just was not ideal for us to carry on with bowling so
we decided instead to go to the park and let the kids loose. This park is
actually quite nice, with a big children playground and a lake with ducks for a
nature, right in the middle of a university campus! As long as we are out, all
3 of us were happy, and my house was safe as well.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Friday: I did have to do the beach trip! I mean for the past
few months, I had taken the girls to the beach when it was snowing or pouring,
so I owed it them to give them one sunny day at the beach.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My friend also wanted to tag along with her
daughter, the more the merrier.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Saturday: I thought we’ll take it easy, so I took them
swimming with me and they loved it!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sunday: I really wanted to squeeze sometime in for a new
friend I had made. She is also a single mum with 4 kids, and unlike me she
struggles to go around with her kids as she doesn’t drive. So I told her I’ll
take her and her kids to a big Park. We had a great time there, but more than
making my kids happy, I was glad I made her kids happy.</div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-81720344234933204612015-04-07T15:47:00.000-07:002015-04-07T15:49:34.614-07:00Meeting your reflection!<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:shapedefaults v:ext="edit" spidmax="1026"/>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:shapelayout v:ext="edit">
<o:idmap v:ext="edit" data="1"/>
</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Way before I got married or even divorced, I have had
friends who were/are single mums. But for the very first time in the past 3
years, I met another Muslim single Mum.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It wasn’t our first meeting, to be honest, I have known her
for the past 3 years; one of her sons is just a year older than my eldest and
her youngest is the same age as my youngest. I used to see her every week at
the local surestart, at first she used to come with her youngest son, then
later with the little girl.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We would always say salam, and I would ask how are the kids
and she would answer in her broken English that they are fine. I tried to have
a conversation with her few times, but it was a struggle, she couldn’t understand
most of what I was saying so I just stuck to the polite hello. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As my kids were growing,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I started to see her at the paddling pool sessions<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I take my girls to. By that time, I wasn’t a
regular sure start attendee anymore; I had a full time job and would only take
the girls to paddling on Saturdays. She would come there on her own with her
four children and we would say hello as we normally used to and get on with our
own things. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last year, I met one of her friends who told me she moved to
the same are as me, and to get in touch with her. I did accidentally meet her
eventually one day in<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Aldi, and we spoke
briefly. She told me she’s seen me a few times on her street walking up (I used
to go down her street when walking to work). And after that we just got on with
our things.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Today, I was shopping in Aldi. As i was loading my car, I
saw her coming out of Aldi, she stopped to say hello. And, we spoke briefly. I
assumed she was going to the car with her husband. As I was exiting the parking
lot, I saw her still walking, I stopped and asked if she’s going home, and
asked her to jump in. She said to drive to my house, and she’ll walk for the
rest of her journey but I said it wasn’t a big deal for me to drop her off. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Her English has improved considerably, we were able to hold
a conversation, and as we were talking, I actually took the direction of my
house. So we drove past my house and I showed her where I live. I told her she should
come around now that she knows where it is. She muttered the word ‘husband’,
and I understood she was asking about my husband being around, as she won’t be
comfortable with her being in my house while his around. And I just casually
answer as I normally do that I am divorced. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could see she was shocked and she said ‘me
too’. This was followed by a moment of silence, it was a silence of excitement,
we were like two old friends who just met after a long time. I was happy, not
because she’s divorced, but I have met someone who knows what it feels like,
who understood and I could see she was feeling the same. Her eyes were a bit
watery, she wasn’t sad, neither was I. We were happy that we had someone to
share something with, we were happy to find someone who understood everything.
She then said 4 years, and I said 3. She told me she was 3 weeks pregnant when
she got divorced and I told her, I was a week pregnant back then. We both
smiled and I could see her being a bit emotional. Then she said, ‘it is hard,
and I don’t have anyone here.’ I understood, I have my brother but I am the
type of person who believe that each one should take of their family, and try
to avoid being a burden or worry for him and his family. But I knew what her
life was like, I live it everyday! We swap numbers, and both left each other
with a feeling of accomplishment. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As I got home, I received a call from her; she forgot her
shopping bag in the car, so back I went. She invited me to come inside, and I
was about to refuse when her children dashed out all excited. I haven’t really
spoken to them before but something told me I should accept the invitation. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I agreed to come in for a little while, and the kids jumped
with joy, they screamed ‘yayyy!’ It was strange, those kids did not know me,
they’ve never spoken to me before yet it made them happy to welcome us in their
house.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I knew what made me stay. Like her, I very rarely have
visitors, except for my brother. And, she didn’t even have that. Her kids must
be happy to just have someone else in the house, to have people to talk to, and
other children to play with. I remember a conversation I had with a friend a
week back, she came to visit, and my house was a mess with kids toy all over my
living room, and I apologised for the mess adding that it doesn’t bother me,
cos my house is for my kids first and foremost. And, she said it’s ok<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(for my house to be like that) as I do not
really have visitors. And she’s a good friend, and she didn’t mean it in a bad
way, and neither did i take it the wrong way. After all, she was telling the
truth and I seriously don’t care what people think of my house or me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My new friend’s kids must just be overjoyed to have company,
to be like other families. Like me, she didn’t belong to any community in the
city.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s Albanian and there’s very
few of them where we live. I am Mauritian, and I have never met another one
here. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the Muslim world, people tend to stay with ‘their’
people, they mingle with ‘their’ people and those who don’t belong to the same
community as them are normally outsiders who they acknowledge on the street but
won’t really call over. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Majority of
Muslims have family/relatives who they hang around with most of the time, leaving
them almost no time to socialise with outsiders or even wanting to socialise
with outsiders. On top of that, if they do socialise with people outside their
family, it would still be mainly with people from the same country of origin as
them, as they belong to the same community. When you belong to a different
minority community, it’s harder to fit in and get accepted, as there is no
benefit from befriending you. On the contrary, you will probably invite them to
eat food other than ‘theirs’ and which they have no interest in tasting.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As a single Mum and and an outsider, I knew exactly how much
of a social life she must have. At least, I drive, I can take my kids around
and enjoy days out with them. Transport is quite costly, and with 4 kids, it’s
not easy to go on public transport. She must be lonelier than me I thought. We
talked without talking, we knew things about each other which we didn’t have to
say. We knew what it feels like when you are feeling really sick, yet you find
the courage to get up and sort your kids out as there’s no one else to do it or
even ask to do it. You just get on with life, and pick yourself up every time
you feel like you are falling apart and start all over again. You know what it
feels like when you feel like doing something with another adult, and no one
has time for you as they are too busy with their friends and family, you know
it all. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We had both moved on from our past, and happily! But, we
have also found each other for support to move forward. Language was not a
barrier anymore, we had each other’s company in a way we can’t even describe.
We felt we could count on each other, without feeling we are burdening the
other!</div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-77296638667637333602015-04-07T14:26:00.001-07:002015-04-07T14:26:24.360-07:00Preschoolers and toddlers: Word formation when reading<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is one of my educational posts.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My eldest who is now 3 years 7 months has started reading
CVC words.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Child 1 is the youngest is her class (she is born in August),
unlike most of her classmates, most of the have spent already at least a few
months before her in pre-school, so starting out she was a bit behind the rest,
but Alhamdulillah she is now doing really well.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I do spend a lot of time at home with her, just teaching her
or going over things she already knows. She is now able to recognise all her
numbers between 1-10 and can put them n the right order. She is also able to
recognise all her lowercase alphabets and is still working on the uppercase. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Recently, as she now recognises her letters, I have
introduced her to word formations. We have just started with CVC words such as
C-A-T. She is picking it up really fast. I would normally say a CVC wor very
slowly so she can focus on each individual letter and put them together using
her alphabet blocks. At first, she would try to find the letters, but she
struggled to put them in the right order sometimes. Lately, I got her to start
reading CVC words from books, and she has started to recognise the patterns
now, and she also enjoys making her own rhymes with those words. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I read to my girls every day, but I found since I have
started encouraging child 1 to read us a book (with CVC words) at story time, it
seems to have boost her confidence and now instead of making up her own stories
from pretending to read books, she is actually spelling out the words and even
manage to guess some words we haven’t come across before. One such example with
the word ‘red’ that we found in one of her book, I have never worked with her
on the spelling of the word ‘red’. But, as she read it out as R-E-D, she
instantly connected it to the word red.<br />
Before, she used to pretend to read the books, now she actually pick up books she can 'read' (partly), such as her little number books. </div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-32407717212429820222015-04-01T13:14:00.004-07:002015-08-16T14:00:16.309-07:00Weaning <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I thought I will share a few tips about weaning inshAllah.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My eldest was weaned at 4 months, reason being she had quite
severe indigestion which caused her to always vomit and be in a state of
hunger. Having older siblings helped me a lot in deciding how to wean my children.
My eldest sister already had 2 kids, who I adore but were a nightmare when it
came to food. They would only eat puree up till almost the age of 3 and refused
to eat any solids. I also knew people whose kids refused to eat anything that
weren’t sweet. And by the time, I had my eldest, my sister’s kids who were
about 6/8 were still very fussy eaters, and could not eat anything that was
spicy.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I thought I didn’t want to deal with any of those issues.
So, I devised a plan:</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>I only fed them proper puree for a week, and the
second week, I would give them food that was not properly mashed and still have
bits in ( obviously not too big)</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>They were not introduce to any sweet food for
the first month</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>By the second week, I also started mixing meat
in their food</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>Their very first meal consisted of carrot and
coriander soup with a hint of pepper (spice).</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>As the weeks go<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>by, the solids bits in their food grew bigger, until they were eating
proper solid food ( obviously I used to overcook a lot of things, just to help
them digest)</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>They would only be served any sweet food as
desert following their main meal.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">7.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>I did tone down the chilli and gradually
increased it, but they would eat it the same food as me just in a more liquid
form until they graduated onto the solid form.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">8.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span>By the time my kids were about 8 months old, I
would not spoon feed them, and would sit right next to them enjoying my meal
with them, they would hold their spoons and eat by themselves and would not
leave the highchair until they have actually eaten a certain amount. (Let me
tell you it does get messy, but it gets better eventually, but what it does do
is make your child independent, so you don’t have to keep spoon feeding them
for the next few years.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
All those worked fab for both my kids, although my 2<sup>nd</sup>
was weaned at almost 6 months. And within a year, my children were both eating
the same type of food as me and on their own!</div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-82768488839374066542015-04-01T12:54:00.000-07:002015-04-01T13:36:43.128-07:00Juicing: energy booster?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam!<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-80uM3U2bcvI/VRxWgu1KNUI/AAAAAAAAAHM/RRAmbypv6-o/s1600/cater.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-80uM3U2bcvI/VRxWgu1KNUI/AAAAAAAAAHM/RRAmbypv6-o/s1600/cater.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our fruit caterpillar to go with The Very Hungry caterpillar story</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As a Mum, I am very watchful of what my children eat and
drink. Ever since they were little, I always wanted to make sure I feed them
the best of<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>everything; I refused to
feed them jar food, and used to make their own baby food that I would take out
with me, as we used to spend a lot of time outdoors.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am not very health conscious when it comes to me. I am a
foodie and I enjoy being one, I don’t particularly have a sweet tooth (probably
owing to the fact that my Dad had diabetes and I enjoyed eating and drinking
sugarless deink with him, while my Mum would pour<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a few spoons of sugar in her tea). But I love
my savoury,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>deep fried or not, I am ever
ready to eat anything that’s salty. I also have a collection of chilli sauce
(indeed I love my chillies!).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After my children were born, and they started to eat solids,
I would join them and we would all sit together and eat. I realised how
important it was for me to lead by example when it comes to eating. My kids are
not fussy eaters Alhumdulillah, they eat everything and that’s something I
wanted to make sure of. Growing up, I remember being a fussy eater, and my Mum
always having to accommodate the menu for me. Anything my brothers and sisters
didn’t like to eat, I wouldn’t eat, and also added to that list was my own ‘i
don’t like it’ food. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As a mother, I didn’t want them to turn out like me, so I
would cook food that I don’t like, and would give it to them even though I
didn’t like it and would not eat it. But, as the kids were growing older and
wiser, they would ask things like ‘Why don’t you have meat on your
plate?’etc... So, I started having more red meat, along with them. No more
questions are asked. Is till I’m not a big fan of red meat, but I do make sure
we eat it once a week. I must say, I have to thank my kids for that,
considering my iron level is always low.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My kids love their fruits/veg. I enjoy my vegetables, but I
am not a fruit eater. Like I mentioned before, I do not have a sweet
tooth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Alhumdulillah, the kids never ask
anything about me not eating fruits, they love it too much to be honest. But,
it did make me realise that I must be lacking in some nutrients and vitamins. I
finally found the solution to it: Juicing! Two of my friends have been juicing
for a while and had really taken a liking to the thing. So I tried it out, and
I love it! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At first I thought it was only going to give me essential
nutrients and vitamins, but it happened to give me much more than that. It had
a feel good factor, I mean mentally and physically, I felt better, it might
just be a psychological thing, cos I know I am doing something right. But I
must admit, it had made a difference to my life, I feel a lot lighter ( even
though I don’t think it made a difference to the scale).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This isn;t the biggest surprise though, but since I have
started juicing, today was the first time I managed to go swimming after a gap
of about 3 months. I used to swim regularly before, but due to work commitments
and feeling uneasy in asking people to babysit for me, I haven’t been swimming
for over 3 months. One thing us single parents feel uneasy about<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a lot is asking people to look after our kids
while we have ‘me’ time. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No matter how
close we are to someone, it is still very hard from us to come forward and say
will you be willing to babysit for me while I enjoy some free time. I have
thought about this a lot, I find that people who are in a relationship do not
find it hard to say that to their partner or even other family members, but
this is one thing a lot of us single parents struggle with. Maybe, because a
lot of us have had to take more responsibility than others, especially in the
case of an absent parent, where all the responsibility have been shamelessly ‘dump’
on us. And we know that it is not a nice situation to be in, and although in no
way we think of our children as burdens, we know what it feels like when people
are having fun instead of stepping up and shouldering their responsibility.
Anyway, today since the girls were at nursery, I managed to go swimming and Boy
it was amazing! I have been swimming for quite awhile, but by far this has been
my best experience! I swam non-stop for the whole session, and didn’t even stop
to breathe for a minute! I did more laps than I have ever done before in the
same amount of time, my speed was better, my techniques were better, and it was
all effortless. At the end of the session, I still felt fresh and probably
could have gone on for a while longer. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
was even approached by people who thought I was great! They should have seen me
swimming during my school days!(sarcasm).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I do really think, this all due to the change in my diet.
But maybe not, but I guess other people should try it and tell me if it had had
the same impact on them!</div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-81168878240262555232015-03-17T14:08:00.001-07:002015-03-17T14:08:09.055-07:00Why we don't have a TV<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-GB</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/>
<w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/>
<w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/>
<w:Word11KerningPairs/>
<w:CachedColBalance/>
</w:Compatibility>
<w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="267">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0cm;
mso-para-margin-right:0cm;
mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0cm;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Many people are actually surprised when I tell them we don’t
have a tv in our household. IT seems strange nowadays, as most houses have the
latest technology and in my house new technology is not much welcomed.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have had different comments concerning my lack of TV at home;
sometimes people insinuating that I cannot afford one; that I am a very boring
person and must be leading a boring life or even that I am a control freak who
is being overprotective when it comes to my children. I know many Muslims who
choose not to have a religious reason; they believe there is too much ‘fitna’ (corruption
that deviates from the right path) on it. I must say, I didn’t choose to have a
TV for that reason.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Growing up, I loved watching TV, it was THE entertainment. I
remember rushing back from school, so I would be on time to watch my favourite cartoons,
or even putting the alarm clock at 6 am on weekends so I would not miss any of
my favourite cartoons. And also, finishing my homework hastily so I can watch
my evening soaps etc... The list goes on and on, there were even times when I
refuse to go out just because of what was on telly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember how my Mum had to stand in front
of the telly, so I could actually hear what she was saying even though she had
been screaming it out for the past 5 mins. Looking back, it looked like my
whole life was centred around TV. Oh I did have good family times, my parents
loved to play board games with us, we use to have competitions from time to
time and those were our family times on top of outings/picnics. Funnily enough,
even though TV was the main focus of my life at that point, I actually barely
remember anything about it, the things I do remember is the games we used to
play as a family, I even remember some of the conversations we had <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>back then. Those are the moments I really
miss, not the TV, not the programmes on telly; none of it; what I do miss is
all my family sitting around the monopoly board, and my mum cheating as usual
while we all try to play honestly, or the dominos competition me and my dad
used to have every month against my uncle and cousin, and how we always beat
them. Or even the days when I was so little, and I used to just watch my big
brother, big sister, dad and uncle playing Carrom, while my mum and aunt served
us snacks.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I remember when I left home for uni, one of the things I was
worried about was how was I suppose to spend my time if i don’t have tv. I must
say though even though I didn’t have tv, I did have my laptop and internet, and
if any was not working, then they were the most boring days of my life; not
because I couldn’t watch anything, nope! Just cause I could not keep in touch
with my family and friends.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I realised I didn’t need a TV anymore, having spent ¾ years
at uni without one I never really missed it. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Following my marriage, I realised how much harm TV can also
cause to a family. I used to resent the TV at some point as it had taken over
my place as a wife; it also became a reason for argument many a times. I had
learnt that there’s a life outside the square (now rectangle) box, and I wanted
to live this new life instead, and my ex-husband thought differently. But this
was never the reason why I don’t have a TV.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I can very well afford one if I want it, and I have even
been offered people’s old TV which I kindly refused. After having my daughters,
I realised how precious each and every minute we spend doing things together as
a family is important; those are the memories they are going to cherish, the
memories they will talk about and miss as well. It is easy to just switch on
the TV and let it babysit and raise your children, but instead I choose to
raise them and make them independent so they won’t need a babysitter. Oh, it
would be way easy to have them in front of the screen, while I get all my jobs done;
knowing that they won’t have made any mess, but this is not the life I have chosen.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I choose to make the mess with them, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I choose for us to not rely on any object, but
to rely on ourselves and I choose to give them fond memories of me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Are we bored? Not at all, we always have something cooking.
There’s always something exciting to do, a new activity, something to get our
hands dirty with, it never gets boring, and we enjoy each other’s company all
along, we talk about random things, we laugh about stupid things, we make silly
faces and sounds; there’s always something to do up till bed time!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As a single Mum this is the choice I have made, any Mum can
make that choice, it’s not because someone chooses a different life that they
must be ridiculed. I spend a considerable amount of my day working, and having
my kids away, it is not fair on them and me to even ignore each other for the
few hours we do spend together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
need me and my love as much as I need them and their love. Besides, we still
have the laptop if we want to watch something suitable for them together. It is
not the end of the world!</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gtBmyYj9YQk/VQiXm28ovnI/AAAAAAAAAG4/aJmxdH_SV_Q/s1600/draw.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gtBmyYj9YQk/VQiXm28ovnI/AAAAAAAAAG4/aJmxdH_SV_Q/s1600/draw.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-57444702117464305702015-02-06T03:33:00.001-08:002015-02-06T03:33:08.603-08:00Deep conversation with a neighbour<div class="MsoNormal">
Deep conversation with anon-muslim neighbour<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam everyone,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I just wanted to share a conversation I shared with one of
my lovely neighbours recently. She’s simply adorable old little lady that
posted me a welcome to the area card when I first moved to the area, and she’s
always putting my bins back after collection, a true lady with English values.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She was just having a little chat with me when she randomly
asked, I hope you don’t mind but I wanted to ask you something. I was like oh
sure go ahead, thinking it’s probably a ‘islam/muslim’ question. Then she went
on: “It’s quite sometime now that you
have moved here, and you seem such a lovely persons, and your girls are such a
delight, I was wondering if you don’t feel lonely sometimes,” she carries on, “
don’t get me wrong please, it’s just I remember when I separated from my
daughter’s dad, a long long time ago, I wanted to find someone else, and I did
eventually find the right one after a while, although later on he turned out to
be the wrong one as well.” She laughs. “It’s just I was thinking, I never see
any man coming around, except for your brother and I was wondering, I know what
I feels like, I just thought maybe I could give you some advice.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was actually really touched by what she said; it was nice
of her to think about me even though we don’t have a deep and meaningful
relationship. It was definitely a sweet thought from her.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I started to think how am I supposed to answer this, so I
started: “Oh thank you that’s very sweet of you. We muslims don’t date you see,
we don’t mingle with men other than family members and we avoid mixing with the
other sex.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She listened carefully, then said, “oh! I understand. But
how do you meet your husband then?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Very good question! We normally rely on family, friends or
acquaintances who would set up a meeting between potentials. For example, a
relative may know of so and so who wants to get married, and bring a marriage
proposal to a potential, who then consider to pursue or not.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“oh that’s interesting, it used to be like that in the old
days, but not anymore, but it’s nice to see some people still living by their
values. So do you just get married after you receive the proposal?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well not really, normally the two parties will talk
(including the bride, groom and families) and if they think it’s a good match,
then islamically as they are not allowed to date then they get married.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Oh it must be hard though. You are basically marrying a
stranger. And, what if you two can’t get on?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Marriage is risky anyway isn’t it? What guarantee do you
have when you date someone that they always gonna be right for you? I mean many
people date for quite a while before getting married and it stills doesn’t work
out. It’s all about destiny.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“True. At least in my case,” she says. She carries on, “so
are your family and friends trying to look for someone for you then?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
An innocent question from an innocent lady. Yet, it was
harder to answer this question.<o:p></o:p></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-40573197380098978712015-02-06T03:32:00.002-08:002015-02-06T03:32:24.375-08:00Be proactive when it comes to abuse<div class="MsoNormal">
Salam everyone!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I recently found something I didn’t even think I had
anymore. A few years back, my latop broke, and I got a new one, then I decided
to get it repaired and even got it back months ago, but never really bothered
to check what’s on it as I thought it must all have been erased, but to my
surprise everything was still on it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you have even the slightest or faintest idea that
something Is not right in your relationship/marriage, you should document it
and save the proofs. You never know, in the future those can be very handy. I
found some pictures that I took the first time my ex-husband assaulted me. I do
remember taking those photos, I took those photos after he had given me my
phone back, it was not a very good camera but it was clear enough. When I took
those photos, he had already sked me to forgive him and I had answered
positive, but for some reason I decided to take some pics of myself that day. I
had never even look at those pics, I think I transferred them quickly on a
hidden folder on my laptop so he wouldn’t have any doubts.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I never even look at the pics properly, I think I was too
scared that I would find something not right, something strange about the way I
looked, and I was afraid to face it, I was afraid to face myself, to
acknowledge what had happened. I wanted to move on and be positive. I didn’t
even bother checking my face in the mirror, I was happy to be oblivious. Oh I
could feel the pain, may jaw did hurt, I remember struggling to swallow food
for a day or two, but I didn’t want to
look, looking meant going through it again, and I didn’t have the courage to do
it back then.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anyway, while going through the laptop, I stumbled on those
pics I took that day and for the very first time, I realised what it looked
like, what it looked like to be an abused woman, and more importantly what I
looked like. This person on the picture looked nothing like, nothing of what I
remember being before or what I think I am now. It was a completely different
person, alien to me. I was not really much about the bruises, I am
dark-skinned, so those don’t show very well, but it was just the face, the look
on the face, the cracks on the lips, the blank expression, the sore lips; no
none of it looked like a younger version of me or an older version, I fail to
recognise this as myself. I look horrible, my eyes were numb, and my lips
cracked in a few places, my face was completely drained of any colour and
emotion. I looked lost in my own world, and soulless. I realised I looked like
a total mess, a complete horror, and maybe had I look at that picture before, I
would have realised earlier on in the relationship that I had to let go and get
away from it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
My point is it’s crucial to document everything, photos
where possible, text messages where you can, audio/video recordings and
snapshots. Anything you really can even if you think it’s not important. Save
it somewhere safe, maybe a friend you trust or even on a pendrive that you can
hide. Make sure you have got enough, so if ever you need to prove anything then
you can. Do not let your abuser know you are holding any proofs, do not
threaten them with it, if you do then you are digging your own grave.<o:p></o:p></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-16509102392393079042015-02-06T03:31:00.001-08:002015-02-06T03:31:14.963-08:00Clare's law- A way to escape domestic abuse?<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 13.5pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Clare’s law- A way
to escape domestic abuse?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 13.5pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">A scheme allowing
people to find out if their partner has a history of domestic violence has been
used by more than 5 people a day attesting the violent past of partners or
future partners.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 13.5pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Clare's Law - named
after Clare Wood, who was murdered by her ex-boyfriend in 2009 - came into
force across England and Wales in March 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">This is subhanallah
an amazing scheme. It can help save so many brothers and sisters from a
turbulent and violent relationship. Although so far only women have been using
it, men also can use it. It works like a CRB or DBS check, where the police
gives you information about whether your partner or potential partner has had a
violent past. This type of information is not only available if your partner or
potential has been convicted but even when no charges were pressed. If the police feel you might be at risk, they
would disclose such information to you. Furthermore, it gets even better as
they can actually tell you if you are in or getting into a relationship with a
violent partner without you asking for it (though I personally believe this
only happens in extreme cases).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Subhanallah, like
it’s often said, you do not really know someone until you live with them. And many men and women will vow this is true.
For Muslims, who are seeking to get married, this is indeed a godsend. A lot of
people cannot find partners and check that the information given to them is
right, sometimes families and friends do not know it all, just because someone belong
to a good and respectable family, doesn’t automatically mean they are too. And,
a lot of people are now turning to matrimonials or aunties who try to find ‘the
one’ for you, how can you verify that all the information about the one is
right. Well, Clare’s law is the answer. People like to hide their dirty past,
some will say it’s between me and Allah, which is true, but withholding
information is not right either especially if it concerns somebody’s future.
People should have the right to make sensible and measured decisions based on
the information. Some may choose to go ahead even if information of abuse is
disclosed (some people do change with Allah’s help), others may not feel so
comfortable with it. But, I think this is great way of making informed decision
and knowing the risk you may be taking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Can you use it,
when the proposal has been brought through someone you trust (family/friends)
why not? You are not undermining your friend/families intention by looking out
for potential danger, even those people may not be aware of the full story. And
if someone is not comfortable with the idea with you checking things up then I
guess something must not be quite right. We are expected to trust complete
strangers and devote the rest of our lives to them, but that’s what they are
until we are married to them: strangers!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Feel free to let
all your friends and family know, Allah knows best, you might be helping in
saving a life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1685970690065723522.post-58671315654270359372015-01-26T12:08:00.001-08:002015-01-27T15:44:34.147-08:00Story telling: Stories of the prophetsSalam,<br />
<img class="irc_mut" height="367" src="https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRoK8kFNDcrdWrMDa9u_2JvYZC2FFf-_Xr23wEVZl-yNgy1RdRT" style="margin-top: 94px;" width="577" /><br />
Like I mentioned in one of my previous blog, it is very important to read stories to your kids to inculcate that love fore reading.<br />
One of the thing I have struggled with is finding interesting stories which are short but straight to the point. I have a few Quran stories &co. books by goodwords, I personally find some of them quite boring and the words are quite hard for toddlers and very young children to read.<br />
Eventually, I decided that I was better off writing up my own stories for the prophets. I would read up about the prophet I want to cover with my children, and take note of the interesting aspects of the story. For example, one of the stories I covered with my children was about Yunus (a.s). Obviously, having an animal is the story, was really the most interesting part of the story for the children. They could not stop talking about the fish/whale (some versions suggest a whale, others a fish). It captivated their imagination which was really good.<br />
I normally tell them the story in the type of language for their level. So the story of Yunus (a.s) goes like:<br />
There was a prophet called Yunus, he was a prophet just like our prophet Muhammad. He lived in a place with a lot of naughty people who did not thank Allah, and did not pray to Allah. And prophet Yunus told them Allah will not be happy if they do not listen to Him and they should astaghfirullah as they have been very naughty and bad. But the people did not want to say sorry to Allah and did not want to pray to Allah.<br />
They were on a boat one day and one person had to jump off so Yunus said he would so everybody else can be safe. And Yunus fell in the water and a fish/whale ate him. But he was not hurt. Allah didn't let the fish/whale hurt him even though it ate him.<br />
Yunus was very sorry and sad. He asked Allah to help him and pray to Allah. And Allah, who always hear our prayers and give us everything told the whale to spit him out. And Yunus was free.<br />
Allah made him sleep under a tree and gave him lots of fruits from the tree, so he wasn't hungry anymore. When he felt better, he went back to the naughty people who were now good and have said sorry to Allah and Allah had forgiven them.<br />
I asked my daughters what do they know of Yunus (a.s) and they could pretty much retell the story, and it goes without saying that 50% of the story was about the whale/fish.<br />
As I mentioned, lessons should be audio, visual and kinesthetic. For the visual part, I would normally google/youtube anything connected to the story and Alhumdulillah stumbled upon a nasheed about prophet Yunus (a.s). We also made some colouring and cutting of fishes and whales.<br />
<br />
My take on this is they need to know about the different prophets, and even when telling them a story make sure they can understand it as there is no point in them learning hard words without actually understanding the moral of the story.Umm Safiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03141582876646173948noreply@blogger.com0