Homeschooling: Teaching shapes to toddlers and pre-schoolers

Salam,

I'm actually not a stay at home mum and do work(as a teacher) .As a teacher, I work with older kids, so toddlers and pre-schoolers are my personal experiment at the moment. I do believe teaching start at home, though i do hope not all parents decided to home-school cos I would be jobless otherwise.
I do not rely on school to teach my children, but prefers to educate them myself. I do believe a lot in audio,visual and kinesthetic learning. My children and I are probably more keen on kinesthetic, which is a lot to do with our sense of touch and feel. We have been working on shapes for a while now, and my 3 year old pretty much recognises different shapes. I was trying to find ways to teach her remember how many sides does each shape have, and while thinking about it an idea came to my mind when i saw her playing with pencils.She was trying to build 'things' with the pencils. It was brillant, just what we needed, so we started making shapes using the pencils, and within minutes she and her younger sister remembered the number of sides each shape has. They were counting the number of pencils they would need to make a shape, in order to know the sizes.
But, this simple shapes lesson turned into much more with their help. It helped them with counting the number of pencils they would need, and also with the concept of 'too many' vs 'too little' when choosing how many pencils they would need.  Furthermore, my 3 year old, who has been working on small /smaller; big/bigger etc made the shapes and analysed which ones were smaller/bigger and why she thought so by counting the number of pencils used and how much space it took on the floor.
My youngest, who is still learning to count used this exercise to work on her knowledge of colours. She tried to remember which pencil in the shapes were of what colours. She knows a lot of colours, but sometimes struggles to tag the right colour name with the shade.
I really enjoyed this exercise with them ,and would say they were they were the ones leading me on through out.
We have also incorporated making shapes in our exercise routine, whereby use parts of our body to form different shapes while exercising, and since we've introduced this, this seems to be my 3 year old favorite exercise routine.

The Myth about Bad parenting

                                                        

Salam everyone,

I had this preconceived view that there is something as bad parenting and good parenting. I would not take away this view, but I have definitely learnt that sometimes even with what we can call best parenting, things don’t always turn out so rosy when it comes to children.

I have worked with children for quite some time now, and I have even designed and delivered parenting classes for a charity. There is not one particular right way to bring up a child, yes; consistency makes a difference but it doesn’t work for all.

With my two children, the way i deal with each of them when it comes to any issue is quite different. They are 2 different individuals with different needs and need to be tackle differently even when facing similar situations. And, they would be called ‘normal’ children by most if not all (if we can really define what’s normal). Unfortunately, not every child is labelled as normal. In my line of work, I come across different pupils showing different forms of behaviour, which would sometime be called ‘challenging’. All the children that I work with have been expelled from schools for reasons that could scare even an adult in many a situation, but then you get to know those children and realise that they are much more than the files you’ve read, and they are not the monsters described on them.

As adults, we tend to look for what we see as ‘normal’ and when this ‘normality’ is not present; we easily dismiss it as challenging/unacceptable behaviour without getting to the root of the problem. The other day, I was in a supermarket and a 7 year old was having a tantrum and people were looking at the parents like it’s their faults, and some even gave passing comments about bringing up children. I am not surprised by the reactions of the people around; after all we have been accustomed to what society has agreed on being normal.  A woman even went up to the mum and said can’t you calm your kid down; it’s no age for him to act like that! Were they wrong to judge someone they don’t know? Were they wrong to judge someone’s parenting skills, would they have done any better in that situation? Honestly, I haven’t got the answer, but what I could see was the Mum being hurt by those comments. I think most parents bring up their children with the best of intentions and sometimes we may choose the wrong way to go about it but most parents want to see their children succeed and have a comfortable and happy lifestyle.  I don’t know if there was anything wrong with the boy, but I thought it wasn’t my job to tell mum how to deal with her child, whom she knows best. But, it did make me think about a particular parent of a child I work with. This parent had been in similar situations a number of times, and eventually decided that she will shut herself to protect her child and people in society. This parent, who I would describe as an excellent parent, she loves her child as any parent would, she cares for him as any parent would and more importantly she even disciplines her child when he acts out and rewards him for the good he does. But, talking to her made me realised she has lost her own life in the process. She hasn’t had a social life for years, if she needed to go out on her own, she felt too embarrassed to ask people to look after her son; or she had been turned down so many times, that she knows there’s no point in even asking someone to babysit for her. It’s quite a sad state of affairs.

I remember reading an article a while back, with a similar situation to the supermarket scene, and a lot of people including parents were commenting to say if your kids don’t behave, don’t bring them with you or we don’t have to deal with your rotten egg etc. So, i wonder if those same people happen to have a ‘rotten egg’ would they stay at home all the time? What would they do if they were unable to find a babysitter? People are quick to judge (including myself) without understanding the ins and outs. I can never put myself in this mother’s shoes cos Alhamdulillah I do not have a child who suffers from a learning/mental disability. I do not know if i could have done any better than her, or was it that I morel ikely would have been worst?

I work with a lot of children who actually would be called SENs and a lot of those learning disabilities cause them to act different to the norm and as a result of our misunderstanding, it builds up a frustration in them;whereby they see themselves as inferior to ‘normal’ children. Once we are able to accept them with their differences and allow them to cope with their disabilities the best way they can, then they turn out in many cases to be the most well-behaved and polite children, of course with the help of good parenting. Some parents do the best they can, but it’s not only up to them to create successful stories for their children but also about society accepting that we are all different and need to accept our differences and accommodate for it. So well done to all those Mums out there who sometimes think they have given up on their life for their children’s sake.Even if people around you do not recognise the selfless sacrifices you make on daily basis, you are worth much more in your children's eyes. It is easy to judge when standing from the castle, but had you been down in the mud, only God knows how you would have coped.

The forgotten daughters

Salam.
This story is an incomplete story based on facts. Only Allah knows what's the ending of the story.
There was once 2 beautiful sisters Tabarakallah. They were the most adorable little things, they were the best gifts any mother could ask for. Their mum called them Hamida and Hadiya. Hamida and Hadiya lived in beautiful house, that their mum had decorated only for them. They loved her to bit and she loved them back, all the same.
Hamida  and Hadiya were quickly growing up and it was time for them to go to nursery. Hamida, by then was now 3 and Hadiya was 2. They started getting more exposed to the world, even though their mum used to take them out  a lot, but they used to mainly go to places full of kids and mums, and never really realised there were other people around them called dads.
Slowly, at school they would see men coming to pick up children, and the children would call the men: "daddy". Then, it hit them, they do have a daddy, yes he comes almost everyday to see them. He doesn't live with them, but he loves them, he picks them up, he holds them and he looks after them. That's what daddies do, and that's also what happen in cartoons and books. Like Peppa, she got Daddy pig or even Red riding hood, she's got her daddy who save her from the big bad wolf. So, this must be their daddy! From that day, they decided to call the man that looks after them Daddy.
But, unknown to them, this man was not their daddy, even though he always answered them when they call him so. No, he wasn't. He was the man who looks after them when mummy is busy, he was the man who would give them gifts, he was the man who would take them out and love them as if they were his own. But what he wasn't, was their dad!
There was a time when they were not born , and their mummy had married a man, a man who affirmed he would lay down his life for his kids, would love them so much that they his kids would love him more than their mummy. This man was the father of Hamida and Hadiya. He was the man who promised to protect his children against anything and anyone that would hurt them. His name was Yahya. Yahya wanted to be the dad his father has never been for him. His father was most of the time out of his life, and even when he was in, did not really show any interest in him, and he hated that.  He promised himself, he would never become his dad. A promise he would fail to keep as the future would tell.
Yahya moved away from Hamida when she was 4 months old and barely tried to keep in touch with her. Yahya and Hamida's mummy went their separate ways when Hamida was 4 months, and Hadiya was still in Mummy's womb. Yahya did not look back at Hamida, she came a few times looking for him, but never found him or would find him for a few minutes and then he would vanish. Hadiya, on the other hand found him for the very first time and the very last time when she was 3 months old. Unfortunately or fortunately, both of them have no recollection of him. But, mummy always tell them about him, as they need to know there was a Yahya, and if one day when they are big enough, they want to venture in the world and find him, then they can cos it's their right!
Back to the present, Hamida and Hadiya are playing with their daddy, and mummy is looking at them and thinking, they could not have chosen a better dad. A dad who selflessly love them, without having a right to, without being asked to and without having a duty to. But there will come a day when they will realise they daddy cannot be their father as he is their uncle (mummy's brother). This man chose to play the role of dad in their life without being asked to and there was their father, who should be playing this role, who have the duty of playing this role, who promised to play this role but never once did he as much glance at them. Mummy might have made a mistake in choosing the wrong dad for them , but they eventually chosethe right daddy who love them as they should be and cherish them.
The story is not over yet, Yahya had moved on and very far, where he has a son, a son he adores and cherish, a son he call his world, a son that means everything to him; but in all this he forgot, he forgot abou his daughters who as he once said were his means to Jannah!


"Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood - he and I will come (together) on the Day of Resurrection - and he interlaced his fingers (meaning in Paradise)." (Reported by Muslim)
So can there be any greater honor given to daughter and for those who wish to have them and bring them up properly? And he said in another Hadith:

"Whoever has three daughters or sisters, or two daughters of two sisters, and lives along with them in a good manner, and has patience with them, and fears Allah with regard to them will enter Paradise." (Reported by Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhee and others)

And in another Hadith: "They will be a shield for him from the Fire." (Reported by Ahmad and Ibn Maajah)

Putting hadith on social network doesn't make you a pious person, it is your actions and deeds that makes you a good Muslim for the akhirah, anyone can be a good Muslims for the dunya by tweeting, facebooking etc but our deeds are recorded on Allah's network and shall be our witnesses on the day of judgement. Fear Allah.

Yezarck's Magical Touch

Salam everyone.

I had been staying over at my friend Yezarck over the Christmas holidays. And obviously, needless to say , an artist den was the best place for children to get creative with all the resources around. My youngest seemed pretty much intrigued by Yezarck's sketch book and decided to leave a few contributions there. I am putting up some pics of my kids doodles transformed by Yezarck, even though there is many more, and some that she is still working on. This woman can get the best out of nothing. She is a talented artist Mashallah Tabarakallah based in the north east with roots in Africa and the Carribean which can be seen in her work.
On top of that, she also makes wonderful artwork on glass such as the very sturdy glass jars (pictured below), she gifted my daughters. It is amazing how they are still in shape after all the torture they have been through but they seem to to never break. My daughters love them and use them like piggy banks and pencil holders.
She also make beautiful jewelry boxes with name engraved on it in Roman alphabets and in Arabic. Lovely gifts for young girls.
Please have a look at her websites and feel free to buy anything from her as most (if not all) of the money gain from the sales goes to the people in Syria.
 https://yezarck.wordpress.com/
https://www.facebook.com/Yezarck?fref=ts
https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/Yezarck

Project Ready Steady Cook

Salam everyone!
For the past month or so , I  have formally introduced my 2 and 3 years old to formal cooking lessons. Alhumdulillah they are really enjoying it.  We call it our Sunday bake off.
My daughters have been playing with cooking dough and helping out with cold food all along, I thought it was about time to introduce them to the hot stuff.
We started off with making cupcakes and decorating them with gel and they loved it. They didn't mind getting their hands dirty and  putting the tray in the oven. It also helped them to do their maths by counting the cups and worked their gross and fine motor skills by mixing the different ingredients and decorating their cupcakes. My 2 year old decorated her cupcakes using the gel frosting to write letters of the alphabet, while my 2 years old used the gel to draw shapes.
I also introduced them through this to their first 'science' lesson. I let them put the tray in the oven, so they can realise how hot it is, and watch how the cupcakes became bigger as they were cooking. They were all excited about it and even told me to be careful as it is really hot. It has created awareness of hot and burnt in them while cooking. Alhumdulillah now when i cook, and i stay away you might get burnt, they actually understand what I mean and even comment about it.
So far, we have made jellies which required them using a whisk on a hot stove, and my little girl even told me the whisk has to be  a big otherwise her hand would touch the pan and it would burn. Some people may think they are too young for this kind of stuff, but I would like to reassure you, I supervise every action they make and do take over where I think it would be too dangerous. We decorated our jelly with fresh satsumas which made a healthy dessert for them.
Recently, we made some pancakes using chocolate tablet. I showed them how we melt the chocolate using hot water and they both attempted the exercise. They enjoyed their new science experiment and are always asking to make pancakes nowadays.
Cooking is not only a family activity now but it also relaxing, therapeutic and a good method of learning and teaching.

Busy Feet

Salam everyone!
As I mentionned in my last blog, I wanted to talk about something important that we have been doing lately : keeping fit and having  a healthy lifestyle.

The children and me are enjoying a new healthy lifestyle, not that it was particular bad before, but it just got better!
Child 1 being finally 3 has started swimming lessons on her own ( without mummy yayyyyyyyyyyy). She loves her swimming lessons, she already enjoyed swimming as I had been taking her since she was only 2 months old, but now she's experiencing life without mummy and her nursery teachers who she knew very well for  about  a year now. She looks forward to it every Monday, no matter how tired she is after school, bless her. Having witnessed how the council handled pre-school and beginners swimming lesson, I opted for private swimming lessons. There is actually nothing wrong with the way the council teach them swimming, I just think where Child 1 is going now is more appropriate. The council offers the children who are not very used to water and swimming, a kind of building self confidence lesson, they play in the water, they have toys etc, but they don't really swim. Child 1 is already confident in swimming pools, so that would have been pointless for her. I was actually surprised by the private swimming instructor, as soon as Child 1 got into the water for the very first time on her lesson, they made her swim on her own from one side to the other on her front, and swim back on her back, so brownies for them lol! Plus, parents are not allowed in swimming pool area. It's only a few pennies more to have private instructors compared to a council one, and I think it's worth it.
Now, I emailed  a guy who offers karate lesson , and he asked me to bring her around for a free trial. i wasn't sure if she was ready for it or not, but it was free! lol. Anyway, we went to the trial, but she was not really interested, the only things she liked where the 'kia' cos she thought they were shouting of joy. The man was really nice and kept coming and tried to get her to kick and punch but i think I was right, she is too young for it. Maybe in the future, a very near one :p Child 2 loved it, unfortunately, she's not even 2 yet and cannot join the lessons, she was doing all the kicks and punches and was annoyed with as i did not put any trousers on her so it would be easier for her to kick and punch like the other kids  o_O.
Activity number 3: I had been taking them to the park a lot lately, and I noticed Child 1 enjoy playing on the big kids toys! She loves all that includes climbing, walking on ropes etc. Also, she managed to walk on the ropes unaided all the time, was climbing frames which even older kids couldn't climb. I thought maybe that's her thing:  gymnastics! So, gymnastics it was! She loved it! It was really interesting cos it was aimed for toddlers, they do some climbing, some jumping, some coordination, and singing as well! Compared to the karate lesson, where it wouldn't have been a smooth transition, with gymnastics, she could still identify with it: it was colourful, it made them sing songs they knew etc. so, we had a winner! What I did not expect though was that I would have 2 children going for gymnastics, Child 2, wanted to try it, even though she was not always successful, she seemed to enjoy it. I forgot to mention we have 2 taster sessions with gymnastics, which is brillant! I have decided to keep them both in gymnastics since they enjoy it both.

That was a bit my now grown up kid life! Coming back to our family life, we have made some changes too. As a mum, I have always been careful about what they eat and rink: no fizzy, no sweets, no snacking unless fruits etc, making sure i cook balanced meals for them and they did not skip meals. Unfortunately, I cannot say I was leading by example, I am a not so great healthy eater. I skip breakfast, I love my carbs, not  a big fan of oil, but i love my chips, and mentally allergic to fruits! I have decided to change my eating habit, so now I eat the same way i want my kids to eat, no junk, eat all my 3 meals, balanced diet. It actually makes me feel better about myself and makes me realise how it's not only my choices influencing their lives, but their lifestyle influencing mine, it's a win-win situation.  On top of that, we have a daily exercise routine, I make them join me when I work out, and they know it's exercise time, and they enjoy it. We also go for walks at least 3 times a week. We choose a park, where there are animals, mainly ducks, a very long path and a playground in some corner. And we all walk, I must say I am very proud of us, especially my babies who walk for about a kilometre without complaining. The most important thing is we enjoy the walk and are also exercising. On  a side note, i think my biceps are getting stronger, as I am now fully trained and experienced in pushing 2 swings at the same time!
Child 1 is in nursery now, so I have more time 2, so I would put child 2 in her pushchair at least twice a week and go for power walks, it makes me feel better about myself, we enjoy spending time together but it also helps me exercise more. I would then stop at a children's playground and let child 2 play, while I carry on walking around the playground as a mad woman. I probably look crazy to some people, a Muslim woman dressed in an abaya going around in circles. But who cares?!
And, on Saturdays, we go to a paddle for £1 session, run by the local council, where kids o and play in the swimming pool with their parents fully dressed!
Now, I actually feel I earn the chocolates and crisp I occasionally snack on, and I do not need to feel guilty. who wants ice-cream?
We certainly have busy feet :D
oh, and from next Monday we are joining a movement session run by the local surestart!

My successful life of being a Single Mum

I often get asked how do I cope being a single Mum. The people who ask me this question are all genuine, they seem to find it hard to cope with raising a child even with a husband around and/or other family members around to support them.
I think the answer is probably the most simple one, it's not easy but you know if you don't do it, nobody else is going to.
I have probably been a single Mum since my first child was only about 3 months old, and I was pregnant with my second child pretty soon after that, probably when child number 1 was about 5/6 months old. Neither of my children were planned but they were fondly expected by me. My marriage was always rocky and the biggest blow came about when child 1 (Fafa) was only 3 months. My second child (Sana) was conceived during a brief moment of reconciliation with my now ex-husband. So, my whole second pregnancy went as a lone parent as well.
I sometime think what my life would be like without my children. I probably would have been further ahead in my career, might be I would be travelling ( I love travelling and visiting new places). Maybe I would have had a happy life filled with excitement and surprises or maybe just a dull life centred around my career. But, there is no point in dwelling too much on this. What I do have, is a life definitely full of: excitement, surprises and never a dull moment!
I have been through a fair share of hardship and it is still not over but I also have had a lot of fun all along. My daughters are amazing, and I guess all parents would say that about their kids. Mind you, I am not the type of person who go on about their family and kids 24/7. People who know me personally would actually tell you I very rarely talk about my kids unless its a milestone they've crossed. I just find it really annoying when you meet someone and all they talk about is their husband/kids. Like seriously?! Is it all you've got in your life. Certainly my kids are the most important people/things my life, but I am also me sometime not only Mummy-me.
I think some people find it hard to know who they really are after becoming a wife/mother. It's like they forgot about what they used to like/do before they got married or had kids. Anyway, I think it's important to find yourself sometime, otherwise your duties as a Mum/wife may become a burden, a burden you find hard to carry. It doesn't need to be like that. I barely have any spare time to spare for myself but the fact is though I am very rarely having a dull time. I enjoy every moment I spend with my kids, instead of making all their activities fit into mine, I try to find a balance so some of their activities are fitted around mine and vice-versa.
My children are probably the most known kids in our local surestart centres, we are there almost every day of the week at different sessions, yet I also make sure all my housechores are done. I hate feeding them take aways or ready meals, I try as much as I can to cook for us. Yet, on top pf all of that, I can still squeeze in my activities, such as performing my prayers, doing my personal research and work, my workout exercises and much more. A lot of the activities that I do for myself, I actually am able to get my kids to join in, so it becomes our activities. In a way you can say it is not only me compromising but them as well.
I think if I didn't have them today I would have had a flourishing career, but probably that's about it. The satisfaction my children to me, no career in the world could. And, my career is waiting ahead for me, I have already started working for it. As they say, slowly but surely. So, surely I will get there, and I am already on the way. I probably can also say that I am satisfied as to where my career is heading and I know I will go further by God's will.
I used to read about how some women felt incomplete, although they had everything except for a child. I think if I just had my career, they would still have been avoid in my life, which my children fill to the brink. I am a much stronger person than I would have been without them. I want to thank my cutie pies  for making me who I am today.
Proud_Mum
PS: I hope you like the elephant pic as much as I do x